If you’ve been on a news blackout all weekend, then read (in this order) this, this, this, this, this, and especially THIS and THIS. That should catch you up. And as a sidenote: HOLY SHIT, WHAT A WEEKEND.

Don’t worry, we haven’t reached the level of Scandalville, USA just yet: Rod Blagojevich began his “I’m Fuckin’ Innocent, Fuckers!” tour on Good Morning America, as his impeachment trial carried on without him.

Thousands more layoffs were announced today including GM shitcanning 2,000.

Obama pointed at today’s job cuts, and said, “So what do you think about my economic stimulus plan NOW?”

Let’s not fool ourselves—this is going to be another TOUGH WEEK. However! After watching this video featuring Murder, She Wrote‘s Angela Lansbury talking about relaxation, self-massage and sex after menopause, I think we’ll all be off to a better start.

https://youtube.com/watch?v=uTS-ACT4_VY%26hl%3Den%26fs%3D1

Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)

3 replies on “Good Morning, News!”

  1. Anglea Lansbury is freakin hawt! But why did she go through all the trouble of drying herself off and rubbing herself down just to get back into the bathtub?

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