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Ammon Bundy—who is mostly disliked wherever he goes—was found guilty of trespassing. (I dont think hes getting the hint.)
Ammon Bundy—who is mostly disliked wherever he goes—was found guilty of trespassing. (I don't think he's getting the hint.) Justin Sullivan / Getty News

GOOD AFTERNOON, PORTLAND! Did you pinch someone today because it's St. Paddy's Day and they weren't wearing green? If so, you really need to reexamine your life choices. Now, LET'S LOOK AT SOME NEWS.

IN LOCAL NEWS:

• Reproductive rights advocates in Oregon have been anticipating the day when Idaho would pass restrictive anti-abortion laws (like they're about to), forcing the women of that state to search elsewhere for the medical procedure. Luckily they're prepared, but can still use our help. Our Alex Zielinski talked to these advocates about their needs and plans for the uncertain future.

• Serial trespasser/far-right annoyance Ammon Bundy was found guilty this week of trespassing again on Idaho state capitol grounds, and was put on a year probation and fined $3,000. (This doesn't include being charged with trespassing at a hospital earlier this week.) Get a clue, Ammon... NOBODY WANTS YOU AROUND.

• Today in "OH NO!"

• A local nonprofit director is suing the city of Portland, alleging that the city defamed her character when it revoked a grant from her organization earlier this year after questioning her leadership. Our Isabella Garcia explains the thorny issue at hand.

• You probably saw this coming, but Oregon and other western states could be stuck in a "perpetual state of drought" if our shitty response to climate change continues, according to a recent paper published in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences. And even if we do hit the brakes on climate change, the researchers add, “We’re not coming back to any kind of normal by today’s standards.”

• If you want to be up to date on the latest fun shows to see, the newest music, and the juiciest gossip, don't miss Jenni Moore's latest edition of HEAR IN PORTLAND, featuring new sounds from J. Graves and Snugsworth, and a can't-miss upcoming concert with H.E.R.!

IN NATIONAL/WORLD NEWS:

• It's currently unclear how many survivors there are from the cruel Russian bombing of a theater in Mariupol where hundreds of civilian Ukrainians (including children) were hiding—rescue operations are underway. Meanwhile it seems like hackers are having a field day with Russian government websites, and WNBA star Brittney Griner has had her detention extended after she was caught allegedly possessing hash oil while crossing a Russian border—a crime that could get her 10 years in prison.

• It's also not helping that Russia's Vladimir Putin (who Biden, not wrongly, referred to as a "murderous dictator") gave a speech/rant yesterday signaling that his war isn't quite going as planned, and that he may be losing his grip on reality (in a dangerous way).

• Rising COVID cases in Europe are worrying US scientists who fear another surge could happen here in the states.

• This headline is bad: "Four Disney employees arrested in Florida human trafficking, child predator sting." But what the cops called their operation is ALSO bad: "Operation March Sadness."

• Netflix plans on punishing generous people by charging people who share passwords outside of their immediate family—which obviously will cause a lot of problems for customers and the company... soooo... good luck with that!

• Feeling thirsty? Then get ready for the boozy fun of the Mercury’s HIGHBALL—a week of specialty cocktails mixed by the city’s best bartenders… and for only $6 each! And it's happening RIGHT NOW through March 20!

• And finally, I'm glad I'm not the only one doing this: