Oh man, Mulder and Scully did not age well.
Oh man, Mulder and Scully did not age well. Joseph Sohm / Shutterstock.com

Okay, let’s be real, Bernie Sanders supporters. We all know your candidate would make the best president. He is awesome. Says everything that a good-guy president should, and actually believes it. <a href=”
http://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/politics/2015/12/bernie_sanders_message_discipline_may_not_be_enough_to_win.html”>Yeah, sure, he’s not super-interested in foreign policy, but imagine how much better the world would be if the Bush administration were half as engaged in world affairs.

We all want Bernie to win.

But. What are you going to do about how he’s lagging 33 points behind the Clinton machine?

Bernie has a few opportunities coming up to grab more attention and claim some of those Hillary supporters. Things could change. It’s possible. I’m not saying you shouldn’t be optimistic. The landscape might shift a bit after the debate this Saturday. (I won’t be watching โ€” as part of my efforts to blot out the unpleasant trauma of this election whenever possible, I’ll be hosting a screening of a certain disastrous 1978 holiday special about stars and wars that night at Verne & Wells.)

And let’s be clear: I want to see Bernie suddenly surge. So do lots of people! He just became the first candidate in the race to bring in two million small contributions, and that’s really nice and all, but those donations average less than $30 and that is really not a lot of money. At that rate, he’s pulled in about sixty million; Clinton had seventy million back in September and surely has lots more now.

Bernie may have more fiscal supporters, but Hillary has more cash. Of course, in a perfect world, the number of supporters would matter more than money. That’s how democracy is supposed to work, after all. And democracy DOES work. Isn’t it pretty to think so?

In an ad celebrating his two-million milestone, Bernie says, “Over two million contributions have been made to the only campaign that rejects the corrupt campaign finance system. You canโ€™t level the playing field by taking money from Wall Street banks and billionaires.”

That’s probably a little dig at Hillary. I hope it doesn’t hurt her feelings too much. She might have to pull out a ten-million-dollar bill to blot her tears.

Sanders people, you’re realistic about this, right? Is that why 59 percent of Sanders supporters say that they’d be OK with Hillary getting the nomination instead?

Or are you expecting some sort of Christmas miracle where Bernie wakes up, throws open the shutters, and shouts, “you there, boy, what’s to-day?” And an urchin yells up “why, Election Day, and you are the clear frontrunner,” and then Bernie throws the kid a shilling and tells him to buy a goose, and the kid’s like, “thanks, but I’m just going to spend this on Amiibos,” and Bernie doesn’t care because he is the president now, which means we all get as many Amiibos as we want. (Obviously my fantasy priorities for a Sanders administration may be different from yours.)

For real, what is your vision for how Bernie’s going to win this? Millions of people mobilizing to support him? Hahaha, but seriously folks.

14 replies on “Can We Talk, Bernie Sanders Supporters?”

  1. voting for the fringe right forced the GOP to cater to their crazies. The Democrats were quite happy to pull as far to the right as they could to get sensible Republicans left in the center. And here pieces like this enthusiastically tell us to fall into line and pick up those sweet Reagan ideals that bankrupted us all while following the lead of a guy with confederate flag stickers and truck nuts on his vehicle.

    So each party races to the right as far as possible because Cleatus is willing to vote for fringe crazy.

    Meanwhile on our fringe left that should counter Cleatus, beautiful young people stare blank eyed and explain that voting just legitimizes the system and they’re true revolutionaries by doing what political machines are paying billions to get them to do–stay home and gaze into their mirrors and weep at their precious tragedy.

    Sure, even V.I Fucking Lenin said such people suffered from an, “infantile disorder,” in not participating in available politics and instead waiting patiently for something worthy of their time. Hunter S. Thompson too derided the hippies that dropped out and refused to participate because of their cult of, “now.” But I’m sure the pretty girl with bangs will convince herself she is a greater revolutionary mind than Lenin and a greater symbol of the counter culture than the good Dr. Thompson…

    So I’ll vote Bernie to pull against truck-nuts. And when he loses, I’ll vote for a fringe Trotskyist party or some shit. If enough people do it, someone from the Congo-line the KKK is leading will have to break off and try to appeal to the left. To paraphrase the good Dr. Thompson, we have to fight the bastards on something resembling their own field.

  2. Fuck this Paul Constant wannabe. I don’t need you to report on the same stuff that literally everyone else is talking about. Knock it the fuck off and stick to Portland-based reporting – and not that stupid “I, Anonymous” crap either.

  3. I’m going to continue to talk to people about his policies, continue to contribute to his campaign, and vote for Bernie Sanders, that’s what I’m going to do about it.

    You said you support Bernie for president, so what are YOU going to do about it? Why are you throwing all the responsibility at others if you support him?

    And for the record, I don’t support Hilary for president, and I’m a mid 30s, white, suburban, middle class, stay-at-home mom – I should easily be her core demographic I would think.

  4. @BernieSanders in my opinion, is the only vote-worthy candidate. But for people like me optimism in politics can be hard to sustain. So, my solution is focused cynicism. If dems left of Wall Street are relentless, and can connect Hillary’s funders to our broken system – we may have a chance. It will take all the tools available online and off, and will require finding a tone that is palatable. I’m talking about a negative campaign in a massive grassroots way, but on the issues – classy, dispassionate, and fact based. Any hint of gender bias, or personal defamation would backfire, and can not be tolerated.

    Many Clinton supporters, have been convinced by broadcast media that she is the only viable choice. It is up to the talents of Bernie supporters to communicate the massive difference between he and Hillary. If we show up in big numbers, we can sway opinions. The primary will be the hardest fight, and time is short.

  5. Sanders is like a second rate Ron Paul (except for the fascistic tendencies and shameless pandering), and whose chances were as good as Paul’s were in ’08.

  6. If he’s got no chance, he’s got no chance. So it shouldn’t bug you if he stays in the race, what with his no chance and all. You don’t seem worried about Rand Paul or George, yes I’m technically a candidate, Pataki.

    That’s who you should be worried about, the family members of George Pataki who have to spend the holidays acting like his campaign has an iota of merit.

    And Bea Arthur, in that very special special you’re screening, is a fucking treasure!

  7. After this “Datagate” fiasco…BERNIE ALL THE WAY or , I’ll be looking into what it would take to collect my Social Security in Costa Rica.

  8. We need to keep in mind that the hack writers here at Blogtown post these kinds of silly articles because:

    a) They never attended journalism school, or if they did, they now have to explain to their parents why they could only get a job as a writer for Blogtown after racking up hundreds of thousands of dollars of debt.

    b) Their meager salaries are paid for by ad clickthroughs, and what better way to get clickthroughs than pissing off your audience while claiming to speak for them.

    c) Like most journalists and aspiring faux-journalists, they are raging alcoholics with personality disorders.

  9. at least the DNC is doing their best to reach out to Sanders supporters, and not making absurd moves to disenfranchise them by overreacting to IT failures caused by shoddy third party vendors with explicit ties to Clinton…

  10. Be creative and patient. The right wingers / east coast are obviously frustred. Reach out to those most oppressed… You’re white trash family on the east coast who thinks only trump and Hillary are running. Talk to those people more.just reposting the article that fits your ideals isn’t enough. We gotta talk these things out.

  11. Great article.
    It’s time for a woman President.

    Bernie supporters are increasingly reminding me of Nadar supporters, who effectively gave us 2 terms of GW Bush.

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