As simple pleasures are gay and hiking is gay, it feels easy to declare that the sport of rockhounding is also a gay activity. And the Pacific Northwest is home to the pros. For this guide, I have collected some recommendations for where you might find beautiful rocks, and eventually build your own rainbow. Let a middle-aged lesbian author of a niche hobby guide show you the way. 

Bright red rocks found south of Gold Beach, Oregon. Alison Jean Cole

Red 

Meyer’s Creek, OR

Just south of the Oregon coastal town of Gold Beach, a diminutive creek runs out of the Coast Range, across the sandy beach, and into the sea. At high tide, sand inundates all, but as the tide recedes, we find treasure. Cobbles of bright red rocks emerge from the creek bed and glimmer in the sun, spider-webbed with veins of calcite and quartz. It’s likely these crimson rocks hail from the ancient Yolla Bolly terrane, (which would be a great name for a lesbian bar). The Yolla Bolly formed during the reign of the dinosaurs, when the Earth was hotter and steamier–at its gayest best. 

Orange

Methow River, WA

On the quiet, eastern flanks of Washington’s North Cascades, the Methow River drains ancient rocks into sagebrush country. A rainbow of rocks can be found here alone, but the ones that catch our eye are the salmony-orange granites—brightly lipsticked by a fabulous variety of feldspar. These rocks were once the underbelly of the continent, brought up to street-level as the Earth shed her glorious coat. Sparkly schist flashes among the colorful granites on this quiet stretch of river. The best place to collect is at the Burma Road Bridge between Twisp and Pateros. Bring a bucket and your best feather boa. 

Fossils found at Stonerose Fossil Quarry in Washington State. Alison Jean Cole

Yellow 

Stonerose Fossil Quarry, WA

 Some 50 million years ago, a vibrant lake formed at the base of a magnificent volcano. Over the eons, pulses of autumn leaves sank to the bottom of the lake forming a muddy layer that would eventually turn to stone. Today, in the quaint mining town of Republic, Washington, a cliff of these ancient sediments has been unearthed. Amid the golden mudstones, ancient plants are preserved as delicate carbon films of their former selves. With each split, visitors to the dig site reveal leafy ghosts to a sun they haven't seen in 50 million years. How the world has changed since the days of their last photosynthesis! “I come here often / To see these delicate stems / Breathed on the rock like frost crystals on a window / But permanently / But forever,” wrote the late poet Lindley Williams Hubbell. It’s hard not to feel deeply moved by the ability to split a mere stone and reach through time.

Green rocks found by the Hamma Hamma River in Washington State. Alison Jean Cole

Green

Hamma Hamma River, WA

Upon first glance, one might suppose the almost neon green rocks along this river’s misty banks are covered in some sort of radiant moss or club-kid lichen. But no—these rocks are inherently, indelibly, effervescently, Grinch green. And it’s all thanks to the mineral epidote. In the rock world, epidote is the hot trans man. Epidote shows up in rocks that have been hydrothermally altered as Earth’s crust gets shoved around. Here, on the wayward side of the Olympic Peninsula, seafloor sediments and old lavas shoved up against the continent in a mosh-pit of tectonics. These bright green rocks were once humble marine stuff, now transitioned to a spectacular gem material that almost no one can resist. Find your way to the banks of the river at the Hamma Hamma Campground, and you’ll see just what I mean. 

Blue

Burnt Ranch, John Day River, OR

Along the steep slopes of the John Day River, bright teal rocks crop out of the ravines. These impressive stones hail from lava flows of the ancient Clarno volcanoes, which erupted some 50 million years ago. Back then, the Earth was hotter and steamier. The age of mammals had just begun. The Clarno volcanoes erupted enormous amounts of lava onto the landscape here, some which eroded into colorful clay minerals that impart bright teal colors seen in the stone. Head to the Painted Hills, then drive north to the Burnt Ranch site along the river. Explore the ravines for this party rock from a much hotter world. 

A mauve (purple) rock found in Eagle Rock, OR. Alison Jean Cole

Purple

Quarry above Eagle Rock, OR

Okay, purple is a stretch. But no one would fight me if I said these rocks were mauve. The quarry these rocks hail from perches high in the Ochoco Range with sweeping views of the central Oregon landscape. The rock deposit is an orby and bubbly patch of ancient volcanic ash that blanketed the landscape some 25 million years ago. The Crooked River Caldera, from which this material exploded, is now considered to be among the largest volcanic explosions in Earth’s history, yet few people have ever heard of it. How obscure! It’s a steep hike up to this location, but the variety of treasure to be found among the quarry’s tailings makes it worth the effort. You are guaranteed to find a veritable rainbow of rocks.

Alison Jean Cole wrote this fun, tongue-in-cheek survey of rainbow rocks for our upcoming Queer Guide. She'll discuss her serious new book A Rockhound’s Guide to Oregon & Washington at Powell’s City of Books, 1001 W Burnside, Tues June 24, 7 pm, FREE)