New York Vinny’s
Corner of 23rd Ave and Lovejoy
I was planning to review the Good Samaritan Hospital cafeteria, until I witnessed the following disturbing scene: Approaching the 23rd Avenue entrance, a wild-haired half-naked man covered with electrodes suddenly came bursting through the doors. A small mob of nurses were in hot pursuit, screaming, “STOP THAT MAN!” as I deftly stepped aside and watched him burn rubber down the street. “Hmmm…” I thought to myself. “Maybeeee he was just another meth-addled burnout, and maybeee he had a bad experience in the cafeteria.” Unwilling to take any chances, I turned around and spotted New York Vinny’s hot dog cart on the corner.
Immediately I flashed back to fond memories of ordering dogs on the street in Chicago: “Okay, fucko! Whaddaya want? I said, Whaddaya want? A Polish? You want pickles on that? I said YOU WANT PICKLES ON THAT? Jesus frickin’ CHRIST, pal! I’m dyin’ here!!” Unfortunately, Portland’s cart vendors aren’t so colorful. However, I gave Vinny the benefit of the doubt and loaded up on all three entrees– a Sabrett, a spicy dog, and even a veggie. Though woefully skimpy on the selection of accoutrements (no pickles, tomatoes, celery salt, chili–and perhaps most heinously–no cream cheese), New York Vinny’s serve their simple dogs down and dirty.
At first glance, the wieners seemed miniscule, especially since I like franks exhibiting the size and girth of porn star Jeff Stryker. However, all dogs in question had a springy skin, and were deliciously beefy, even (suspiciously enough) their vegetarian selection, which sported only the slightest hint of soy. The spicy dog is slightly larger, and delivers a small kick that gathers momentum, stopping just shy of making the eyeballs sweat.
And while the accompanying sauerkraut and sweet relish were standard-issue, the sautéed onions and ketchup concoction mixed beautifully with the grocery-store chewy buns, and tasted downright savory.
Though I still question the omission of Polish sausage and the wurst brothers (knock and brat), Vinny’s steam up good dogs that even a meth-addled escapee should have trouble passing up.
