This Week in the Mercury

Rebel Girl, Redux


Rebel Girl, Redux

Kathleen Hanna Doesn't Want a Riot Grrrl Revival. Neither Should We.

The Long, Hot Summer


The Long, Hot Summer

After a Very Dry Winter, are Hotter Temperatures and a Drought in Portland's Near Future?

Friday, July 20, 2012


Posted by Anonymous on Fri, Jul 20, 2012 at 4:02 PM

Cool new Portland startup looking for fun and energetic people! Are you fun and energetic? Do you think outside the box? WE WANT YOU!

Below is the list of qualifications we look for:
- At least a Bachelor's degree from an expensive university (MA preferred. PhD a plus)
- 24 hour/7 days a week availability.
- Must have won at least 2 Nobel Prizes
- Must have at least one Olympic gold medal (not in figure skating)
- Must be an absolute Guru in all office and media programs, and be able to teach others.
- Must be able to work within an overbloated administrative staff.
- Cannot weigh over 170 pounds.
- Must have car and insurance, plus your own gas budget.

Since we are a startup, we cannot offer pay, but you will receive loads of credit and cookies!

Apply Now!

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