To Be Paid in Bull
The views expressed in these submissions are from anonymous, unverified sources and do not necessarily represent those of the Portland Mercury.
Dear City Council: I called this escort, and I was told she cost $150 an hour. Well, she's ready to leave now, and says I actually owe her $300. On top of that, my phone bill is $1,500 this month ($2.99 a minute adds up fast!), my car needed an alignment (due to all the pot holes on your city streets that don't seem to be a priority), and my gas bill has gone up from the extra driving I have to do to get to a park I can actually let my dog play in! Sooo... I seem to be OVER BUDGET by about $1,600, and you need to pay that $1,600 whether you like it or not! You have no way out of this, there is no recourse you can take, and I don't care what you have to say. I DON'T CARE if you don't hire escorts, or don't have a need to call a number that charges $2.99 a minute. WHAT? You have bills of your own? SO WHAT! Just work a few more hours of overtime!! I don't know why you're so upset, it's not like I built a TRAM or anything!!—Anonymous