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Jack Reacher says things like “I will break your legs. I will break your arms. I will break your neck.” If Reacher says these things to you, Reacher will break your legs. And your arms. And your neck.

Reacher is a drifter who uses military training to murder people.

Reacher only murders bad guys, though, and is so likeable that no one is mad about his coast-to-coast trail of broken-necked corpses.

Reacher has had friends, family, lovers. Reacher knows they are unnecessary. Reacher’s solitary life is elegant. But who can he call for help?

Reacher would have known that was a trick question.

With honor and distinction, Erik Henriksen served as the executive editor of the Portland Mercury from 2004 to 2020. He can now be found at henriksenactual.com.