LADY? GET A CLUE.
VIA VOICEMAIL: "Hello, my name's Georgine, and I'm fairly new to town. All in all, I think the Mercury's great... your coverage of things is very lively. But I'm having trouble with the little music write-ups? The person who writes them keeps saying, 'Anyone who knows anything feels this way,' or 'If you don't know this, you need to get a clue,' and maybe that's fun among people who know each other well, but I find it very offensive! Obviously not everyone in the world is going to like things the same way, and it makes me feel like you're not giving me a clue of anything worth considering about this band. Everything is just, 'the best, the best, THE BEST' and I know you know what I'm talking about, so good luck and goodbye!"
WHO'S THREATENING WHOM?
RE: "Fear of A Black Bloc Planet" [News, Aug 2], regarding the Joint Terrorism Task Force's recent raids on homes of Portland anarchist activists.
To me personally, the FBI seems to act like the real terrorists: They try to instill fear in people that are unhappy with the current establishment. Check your home for bugs if you ever get raided by the FBI/JTTF. Fucking fascists!
Posted by chicostix
DOUBLE TAKE
RE: "Future Shock" [Film, Aug 2], reviewing the new Total Recall movie.
I thought the world was well fleshed out, and the story was explained clearly. Am I the only one who thinks those two main actresses [Kate Beckinsale and Jessica Biel, who don't really look that much alike] look exactly alike?
Posted by ROM
THE DUMPS
RE: "Start Packing," [I, Anonymous, Aug 2], in which an anonymous author complains about people leaving garbage in nature.
We lost half the spots I had access to growing up on the Washougal because of asshats like that. Why? Because most of them were private and people were sharing them out of goodness, not to be trashed. I saw people leave their diapers on rocks in the middle of the river.
Posted by roseofportland
FEMALE PRISON PEN PALS: LAST CHANCE!
RE: Our summer Female Prison Pen Pals series comes to a close at long last with this final group missive, the last one in our stack. All these inmates can be reached at 15 N 2nd E, Rexburg, ID 83440.
TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN—We would like our ads added into your newsletter.
Single, locked up, and sexy. My name is Gloria Hernandez. I'm a 34-year-old Latina, 5'3', 125 lbs, long black hair.
Single 25-year-old looking for a pen pal. My name is Tarah Gilliland, I'm locked up, 5'1", red auburn hair, hazel eyes. You can look me up on Facebook.
Single, 23 years old, Asian, 5'8", 132 lbs, long black hair, brown eyes.
Locked up and lonely! My name is Samantha Lynch, I'm African American.
My name is Denise Hilton, I'm 5'2", brown hair, blue eyes. Looking for a mature man to write me.
FEMALE PRISON PEN PALS: THE CONTROVERSY!
RE: Letters [Aug 2], where commenter BokChoy has been posting the convictions, release dates, and other publicly available information about the ladies in our summer series, Female Prison Pen Pals.
Bokchoy, give it a rest, will ya? No one cares. You're starting to look crazy.
Posted by DamosA
Actually, BokChoy is doing a service alerting readers (and potential future victims) to the records of these incarcerated would-be pen pals. And the Portland Mercury is doing a disservice (and one with potentially serious, even fatal consequences) by treating as a continuing joke linking felons with unsuspecting suckers.
Posted by MikeWB
OMFG! You mean people in prison are there because they were convicted of a crime? Weird. My pen pal told me she was there as part of an AmWay job training program.
Posted by stukasoverpdx
STUKASOVERPDX nailed it: People who are in prison are almost always criminals. Please pen pal responsibly, always wear a condom, never drink and drive, and wipe front to back, okay? Okay. Stukas wins two tickets to the Laurelhurst Theater.
