MAYBE IT'S NAÏVE to think that a movie in which Meg Ryan tapes Timothy Hutton to a toilet sounds promising, but at least I can't be accused of being the only one. Director Cheryl Hines (you know her best from Curb Your Enthusiasm) thought so too, and we were both wrong. On the upside, Serious Moonlight does have excellent potential as a drinking game where everyone takes a shot each time the phrase "taped to a toilet" is uttered.
How does a character wind up in such an emasculating state? In the case of Ian (Hutton), he's about to leave his wife of 13 years, Louise (Ryan), for his much younger girlfriend (Kristen Bell). When Louise catches Ian in the act of writing her a pithy breakup note, she launches into borderline sociopathic denial, flowerpots make contact with his skull, and dude winds up... taped to a toilet.
One part estrogen overdose and two parts sheer embarrassment, the formerly resplendently charming Ryan's saving grace is that her extensive plastic surgery looks pretty good. Now take a shower and watch Innerspace three times.