NO ONE LISTS like we list, so here's the best lists that we listed in this "Lists" issue of lists.

1. Portland's Most Gauche Sommeliers (Continued Here)

2. 92 Neighborhoods You Wouldn't Be Caught Dead In (Continued Here)

3. Top 36 Varietal Pinot Noir Pairings that Celeste Davenport (That Bitch) Knows Nothing About (Continued Here)

4. The 26 Portland Venture Capitalists We'd Love to Blow (Continued Here)

5. Holistic Day Spas: The Ones that Aren't Run by Witches (Continued Here)

6. The 106 Best Portland Art Galleries that Exclusively Feature Shiny Pieces of Driftwood (Continued Here)

7. Laughing Mirthlessly: 23 New Variations! (Continued Here)

8. The 19 Hottest Ways to Disguise Your Addiction to Pain Meds (Continued Here)

9. 82 Portland Gays Who Will Feign They're Your Friend for Cash (Continued Here)

10. The Top Kids' Immersion Schools that Have Exactly Zero Minority Students (Continued Here)

11. Portland's Sexiest Ear, Nose and Throat Specialists (Continued Here)

12. 37 Homeless Charities: Snort. You're Kidding Right? (Continued Here)

13. 224 Thinly Veiled Advertorial Suggestions for the Perfect Holiday Gift! (Brought to you by Saks Fifth Avenue in Bridgeport Village) (Continued Here)

14. Portland's Most Powerful, Handsomest, and Wittiest Rich People from the Very Best of Families that Could Probably Really Use Their Own Vanity Magazine to Promote Their Fabulous Exploits and Also Those of Their Wealthy Friends (Continued Here)