THE COST OF DOING BUSINESS
RE: The event information provided in My, What a Busy Week!, our weekly page of event picks.
DEAR MERCURYโI appreciate that you list concert prices, if only in My, What a Busy Week!. I know this isn’t the venue to rant about Ticketmaster, TicketsWest, etc., but I do wish that you would more accurately report ticket prices. There is no way to buy a ticket to the Walkmen for $22. So, it would be more accurate and more responsible for you to reflect this in your reporting and, in doing so, reward those venues that do sell tickets at the listed price.
Chris
______________________________________________________________________________
VOTED “THE WORST THING THE MERCURY‘S EVER PUBLISHED”
RE: “Deez Nuts Be Saggins by Bilbo Baggins” [New Column, Jan 23], the latest in our series of jokes based off of things that rhyme with people’s names.
DEAR MERCURYโYou’re so good about thrashing the Portland Police Bureau when it comes to race relations, but you always go fuck it up by doing some racist shit of your own. Why give Bilbo a stereotypical Ebonix accent? I’m a black dude, and I love Bilbo Baggins. I don’t see why it’s funny to make fun of a lack of literacy in the black community. When you sit down and write this shit, who is your audience? Maybe tread softer; maybe stop gentrifying my psyche.
Ripley Snell
______________________________________________________________________________
VACCINES: STILL LEGIT
RE: “Vaccine Court” [Letters, Jan 23], in which a reader writes in to defend Jenny McCarthy’s contention that vaccines cause autism, while another (Liz) explains why it’s not okay to make fun of dreadlocks.
Encephalopathy occurs less than once for every million measles-mumps-rubella vaccinations administered. Compare that with encephalopathy rates of 1 per 1,000 in measles patients and 1 per 500 in rubella patients. The Vaccine Court has consistently rejected any link between vaccines and autism, as has the CDC and every scientific study published on the subject. Printing the conspiracy theories put forth by the anti-vaccination movement isn’t just scientifically illiterate, it’s a serious threat to the public health.
Dennis McMillan
Hate to tell you this, Liz, but just about every single ingredient of white American culture was appropriated from somewhere else if you look into it closely, usually discarding or changing the historical significance that it originally had. And I see lots of kinds of people in Portland sporting the hairstyle in question, not just privileged white kidsโpretty broad generalizations there. Not to mention claiming to speak for all be-dreaded white people’s personal views on why they did that to their hair: because it’s “earthy,” because they want to emulate poverty, etc. And what area are we talking about here that only has 1.7 percent people of color? Not the city of Portland, that’s for sure. The whole “white”/POC distinction is widespread but seems dangerously close to reinforcing the idea of an “other.” And yet a lot of the people who are visually “white” have a serious degree of mixed ancestry going on. Attributing a single view of “people of color” to “white people” on the whole seems simplistic to the extreme. People [might] assume I’m sticking up for the hated white-people dreads. I’m not, but have at it. Wow, you guys hate dreads on white people? Fascinating, I haven’t already met 100 other people with the exact same tastes and opinions before.
posted by geyser
______________________________________________________________________________
DREAMBOAT ANNIE
RE: Ann Romano’s One Day at a Time column, weekly.
GREETINGSโI have finally gotten off my lazy ass to write to Ann [Romano]. Her column, One Day at a Time, has caused me to have three nut-replacement surgeries due to blowouts. Her writing makes it seem like I am watching a program… like she is right in the room with me… and it’s not the mushrooms. Her satire of and cynicism toward the “beautiful people” is enough to keep me self-medicating the rest of the week.
Stuntmancal
PS: Do you have a line on any mushrooms?
SORRY STUNTMANCAL, we like to keep our sources close. But we can hook you up with two tickets to the Laurelhurst Theater, where you should always be a cordial and low-maintenance customer, especially while on drugs.

It’s “Ebonics.” Ebonix is, I’m pretty sure, a character in the Asterix books.
“Encephalopathy occurs less than once for every million measles-mumps-rubella vaccinations administered.”
AH-HA!!! So it IS true!! THEY’RE TRYING TO ENCEPHALOLIZE OUR BRAINS LITTLE BY LITTLE, ALL SUBTLE AND SHIT!!!
The “lack of literacy in the black community”? That’s so racist. (Joking)
The column wasn’t a dig at black illiteracy, it was a rehash of some ’90s-era humor which played upon the use of language that found currency with the “gangsta rap” craze, some of which was very clever (Herbert Kornfeld RIP).
Well said, Mr. McMillan.
While geyser’s rebuttal is well written, his approach is misguided at best. Sounds like you are advocating for a “color-blindness” approach. I hate seeing anything like this published, the position that acknowledging difference is “othering” and that white people have appropriated everything so what difference does it make is horribly detrimental to furthering any sort of dialogue about the inequalities and structural violence of our society (and yes, white dreadlocks are symptomatic of these issues!).
Two pieces of comedy gold here !) someone actually gave enough of a shit about some sophmoric nerd shit involving a Hobbit protagonist to be offended (assuming they are being serious, which I doubt). 2) someone actually finds Ann Romano funny (wait, they are being facetious, right? I can never tell with you zany kids). Oh and I have some lovely wood ears if you want