GOOD MORNING, BLOGTOWN! I get so weak… blood starts racing through my veins. I get so weak… boy it’s something I can’t explain. LET’S GO TO PRESS.

Check out a map of places in Oregon where the vaccination exemption rate is the highest. (The answer MAY not shock you in the least!) Also when it comes to Oregonians who refuse to vaccinate their kids, there’s bad news and good news.

Rachel Maddow takes some time away from laughing at Republicans to laugh at Democrats—particularly Democratic Gov. John Kitzhaber and first lady Cylvia Hayes.

German chancellor Merkel and President Obama met today to develop a scheme to slow down Putin’s push into the Ukraine.

The US Supreme Court has refused to stop same-sex marriages in Alabama, setting off a HILLBILLY PANIC.

North Korea shows off their new “cutting edge” missiles—that can fly roughly 50 feet farther before dropping impotently into the ocean.

According to a new book, J. Edgar Hoover’s FBI kept files on prominent African-American writers for decades.

Uber responds to growing safety concerns in India by installing a “panic button” in their app.

Reality star Bruce Jenner was in a devastating crash over the weekend, in which he may have caused the death of a woman.

At last night’s Grammy Awards, Kanye West finally patches up his feud with Taylor Swift, and almost immediately turns around to start a brand new feud with Beck (who beat out Beyonce for best album). The video is priceless, btw.

Two other emerging themes from last night’s Grammys: #BlackLivesMatter and domestic abuse. (Oh, here are the winners and losers if you care about such things.)

Now here’s what’s going on in your neck of the woods: RAIN, AND LOTS OF IT. However things start clearing up tomorrow, and by Friday it will be 60 degrees. IN FEBRUARY.

And finally, here’s a collection of very dirty things that sports announcers say… that aren’t really dirty at all. (Still headphones on if your boss is a jerk.)

Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)