Forget ghosts and zombies and serial killers. You want to know the scariest thing about Halloween? The Entitlement. Every year, swarms of beggars feel they have the God-Given Right to trespass on other people’s Private Property, demanding a hand-out and threatening the property owner with vandalism if he doesn’t bribe them to go away. Any other day of the year, it would be illegal. Usually, they’re accompanied by their parents, indoctrinating their offspring to take their rightful place in the Culture of Gimme-Gimme-Gimme. Is it any wonder they grow up to expect affordable health care and education and housing? Why not a free Tesla, too?
No, little Logan and Isabella, you’re not a superhero or a fairy princess or the left shark. You’re a Parasite. You want candy? Then Get a Job and Buy Some. You want to come onto my property? Then Pay Rent. Otherwise, Go to Hell.
I guarantee you that every road-warrior homeless youth turning downtown Portland into a shit-hole that decent people can’t go to started off as an “adorable” treat-or-treater.
I’m going as a Singer/cancer researcher, and I love Halloween. Growing up in Buffalo, only a few times I remember actually going through the neighborhood with my grandparents. I never had a store bought costume,but Loved every minute of it just the same.
You couldn’t mean a word you say. I know you were a kid once. I bet a mean one.
Can somebody give this guy a hug? JK, I understand, I just got my taxes , too.
I am really looking forward to egging your house!!
I remember you. The guy who showed up at the company Halloween party dressed as Ayn Rand. It’s a shame you nodded off, and I have to admit: I was the one who wrote “Atlas Shat His Panties” on your forehead.
Props, Mecklem.
I might give you some leeway if you had any originality at all, but I heard this same bit thirty years ago. And I’m betting it wasn’t original then either. Extortion, blah, blah, blah. Turn off your porch light and hide in the back bedroom for a couple hours like the rest of us cheap bastards.
“Entitlement”: the bogeyman of our age.
Entitled has now taken over from Sustainable as the Most Over-Used Word.
Google “history of Halloween” and you will realize Trick or Treating was invented to keep kids from causing mischeif. Then go back to your hole in the ground as no one likes you anyway.
Trump 2016, amiright?