What Portland Business Owners Can Learn from the Porntastic Paris Theatre

If you’re anything like me, you’re a sex positive person—but even some of us who identify in such a manner never stepped foot into long-running porn palace, The Paris Theatre. As the WW reported this week, the Paris will be getting a non-porny makeover by the owners of downtown clubs Dirty and Splash bar (with strong involvement from current Paris managers), to become more of a nightlife venue that will feature a bar, dance nights, and occasional event flicks like The Rocky Horror Picture Show. And they will be giving that cool looking (but run down) marquee a new makeover as well—so good for them!

HOWEVER! Since I never visited the Paris I had NO IDEA of the extra lengths they would go to in order to satisfy their customers… take for example these cryptic tweets you’ll regularly find on their Twitter account:

WHAAA?? At first I figured this was some kind of spy-level shit, or maybe some sort of nefarious code for potential terrorists—but I couldn’t have been more wrong. The code for their tweets are right on the Paris website, and are there to signal when “action” arrives at the theater:

NOW THAT’S WHAT I CALL CUSTOMER SERVICE! And I had NO idea the Paris came equipped with a dungeon, a bedroom (for sleepy patrons, presumably), and best of all, a “perky exam table” (!!!)

So this is just an early warning that YOU may want to skip over to the Paris Theatre speedy quick before all those terrific customer-based incentives go away forever. And business owners of Portland (especially CenturyLink)? YOU CAN LEARN A THING OR TWO FROM THE PARIS.