GOOD MORNING, BLOGTOWN! Every man wants a woman that can always keep him in the mood. And I’m that kind of girl, so this is what I tell my dude. LET’S GO TO PRESS.

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Courtesy Rally to Stop Trump’s #SwampCabinet

Around 100 people rallied yesterday outside of Senator Jeff Merkley’s office in downtown Portland to inspire the senator to keep up the good fight against the immoral Trump administration.

Forest Grove’s city council have taken the coward’s way out and voted not to become a sanctuary city (protecting undocumented immigrants) even though a quarter of their residents are Latino—because it might be “too polarizing.” Give them a call at 503-992-3200 to let them know how you feel about that.

Expect scattered protests downtown today to protest against the PPB’s overzealous use of force at last Friday’s Inauguration Day demonstration.

Mayor Ted Wheeler is showing support for Commissioner Chloe Eudaly’s idea that landlords must pay moving fees (including security deposits and lost wages) for victims of no-cause evictions.

If you’ve got the moolah to fork it over, the wildly popular Broadway show Hamilton is coming to Portland and tickets are on sale—but you have to pay for the entire season.

While everyone knows that Donald Trump, who lost the popular vote by 2,864,974 votes, is lying about there being voter fraud by “illegals,” he’s going launch one of his “major investigations” into it, which will be the BEST, MOST WONDERFUL MAJOR INVESTIGATION EVER! SAD!

But wait a second, Trump’s senior advisor Steve Bannon is registered to vote in two states, sooooo… the voter fraud is coming from INSIDE THE HOUSE!

Trump is expected to sign an executive order that will enable the construction of his stupid border wall between us and Mexico, as well as deny entry to certain immigrants, while punishing sanctuary cities (like us!). Let’s see where that gets you, Cheeto.

If you loved the Women’s March, I bet you will also love… THE SCIENCE MARCH.

As I mentioned yesterday, Trump is also catering to his millionaire buddies in the oil industry by pushing forward on the Keystone XL and Dakota Access pipelines.

Trump reportedly has three people in mind that could possibly fill the vacant Supreme Court seat, who we’re all supposed to be “very, very excited” about—Neil Gorsuch, Thomas Hardiman and Bill Pryor. All of whom are very conservative, hate abortion, and I’m not excited about at all.

And then Trump tweeted that if Chicago didn’t stop its reported uptick of gun violence (which is disputed, by the way), he is going to “send in the Feds!” Sure thing, Felicia.

Meanwhile the Republicans in Congress are pushing ahead on their proposed ban on private insurance paying for abortion services as long as the ACA is around, and a long term ban on abortion coverage with Medicaid.

And just in case you think everything is hunky-dory in Trump town—IT MOST CERTAINLY AIN’T.

The president is a 70-year-old child whose TV time must be closely monitored — because any news story that upsets his ego will trigger a temper tantrum followed by irrational demands that his indulgent, overwhelmed guardians will be helpless to refuse.

Or so Donald Trump’s aides keep confiding to the nearest available reporter.

Read this hilarious story here.

Now let’s examine this WEATHER situation: Cloudy and 44 today, but lots of sun through the weekend.

And finally, here’s a video from 1998 of Trump advisor Kellyanne Conway doing STANDUP COMEDY. (Don’t quit your day job! Actually, quit your day job!)

Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)