As reported in the Oregonian, state representative E. Werner Reschke from Southern Oregon recently introduced a bill to change the name of the Portland Trail Blazers to the Oregon Trail Blazers to “recognize the importance of the team to the entire state of Oregon and its place in the hearts of Oregonians across the state.” Do people across the state not realize that Portland counts as Oregon? And that liking something from Portland doesn’t automatically make you a liberal snowflake cuck, or whatever they think we are? In response, I hereby propose a first-of-its-kind TTSP legislative bill to “recognize that Portland counts as Oregon and liking something from Portland doesn’t automatically make you a liberal snowflake cuck.” This bill may be co-signed by everybody who has purchased Portland Trail Blazers merchandise since 1970 and doesn’t want to buy a new hat.
