Guys... singer Jason Derulo invented a corn-eating machine! Credit: Twitter Screen Shot
Guys... singer Jason Derulo invented a corn-eating machine!
Guys… singer Jason Derulo invented a corn-eating machine! Twitter Screen Shot

It’s WEDNESDAY: The day when you say, “Wait… it’s Wednesday? Yeaaaaah, I don’t think it’s Wednesday.” It’s also the day when you need some serious cheering up from the Mercury Cheer Up Club—which is chock-a-block full of funny things that will make you forget it’s Wednesday! WHICH APPARENTLY YOU ALREADY DID.

Today in “Customer service” news:

Today in “George of the Jungle” news:

Today in “Look… all the guy wants is a tan!” news:

Today in “I’m gonna quit this job” news:

Today in “No… YOU come here” news:

Today in “Classic quarantine clips” news:

Today in “Jason Derulo’s new corn-on-the-cob machine” news:

If you like this and our other A++++++ content, please consider donating to the Mercury to keep us around!

Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)