KARATE CHOP/STAB

DEAR “ASIAN PERSUASION” [I, Anonymous, Dec 13, wherein the author
implores white people to stop acting like Asians.]—Your thoughts
make as much sense as saying Italians shouldn’t eat tomatoes (a New
World food.) Ever hear of pepper, gingersnaps, or gunpowder, all
esteemed American traditions, all from “Asia”? Oh, I guess you also
believe the only vegetarians are Asian, and only eat tofu while wearing
kimonos and watching anime, and that all Buddhists are Asian. The
following is a list of foods that you cannot eat because they are
Asian: fava beans, carrots, cabbage, celery, fennel, garlic, onions,
parsnips, peas, spinach, and cinnamon. And one more thing: Chopsticks
are great because when I am not eating my mouth-watering wonton, I can
stab out your eyes with my karate chop.

 Anonymous

A MILE IN COPS’ SHOES

DEAR EDITOR—Matt’s story was a breath of fresh air [“Spread
‘Em,” Feature, Dec 13, in which Matt Davis goes to Citizen Police
Academy]. As a Portland cop, and more “liberal” than most, I get a bit
tired of the second-guessing critiques by writers [who] have no idea
what the job is like. Most of us care deeply about others and want to
do our very best to help. Certainly there will be ample good
opportunities for critiques down the road, some well deserved.
Remember, if we could take the humanity out of cops we might end the
errors, but we would lose the compassion.

Sgt. Wayne Kuechler, Portland Police Bureau

COP TALK

FOLKS AT THE MERCURY—Matt Davis’ piece on attending the
Citizen [Police] Academy did not come off to me as a “pro-cop” article
[“Spread ‘Em,” Feature, Dec 13]. He exposed that much of their training
is focused on tactical use of violence, and fear that every citizen is
a potential threat, even though officers conduct thousands upon
thousands of citizen contacts per year without being attacked or shot.
As I pointed out to Matt in our interview, his other articles, which
generally report on questionable police use of force, are not
“anti-police” either; they are for police accountability. If the police
themselves are not interested in holding one another accountable
because they feel it is “anti-cop” to do so, that is a problem Portland
needs to address.

Dan Handelman, Portland Copwatch

BLAMELESS FARELESS

DEAR MERCURY—The ongoing debate about the elimination
of Fareless Square hinges on the belief that suburban violence is
somehow the fault of downtown’s free rides [“Un-Fare,” News, Dec 13].
Criminals board the MAX in Gresham, then get off the MAX still in
Gresham, and then attack people in Gresham, and it is all the fault of
Fareless Square, many miles to the west. I am an ex-cop who does not
understand why people like [Sheriff Bernie] Giusto and [TriMet General
Manager Fred] Hansen cling to claims that without the need to check
fares, cops can’t start conversations with suspicious people or boot
disruptive and violent people. I started thousands of conversations
with “suspicious people” when I was in law enforcement through the
highly technical and specialized method known only to advanced
criminologists as “walking up and saying hello.” I don’t know what
Hansen & Co.’s real motivation is. I don’t know, and I don’t
care.

Dave O.

MORE HITHER, PLEASE

DEAR MERCURY—Please include more photographs of
shirtless Holcombe Waller in “come hither” yoga poses similar to
the one accompanying the article “More than a Pretty Voice” [Music, Dec
13]. They’re just… great. 

Ben Nystrom 

WE’LL DO OUR BEST, Ben, we’ll do our best. In the meantime, you
win the Mercury‘s letter of the week, which means you snag two
tickets to the Laurelhurst Theater and lunch at No Fish! Go
Fish!—go thither.

DEPT. OF CORRECTIONS

We referred last week to Portland
Patrol Services (“Checking the Checkers,” News, Dec 13). The company in
question is in fact Portland Security Services, Inc. We regret any
confusion and inconvenience the error may have caused.