I know you think you’re being quaint by carting your big ass red wagon to the grocery store, but you’re just being annoying. “We’re so Portland!” you must think as you drag that thing around the store, blocking every aisle you walk down. You then blocked the whole express lane with your stupid Radio Flyer to pay for your one bunch of carrots that you bought. That’s it. You brought a giant red wagon to the store for a bunch of carrots. You know the store provides carts to hold your child and your groceries, right? Do that next time, because you look like the pill head teacher from the Magic School Bus books walking down the street with your knee-high patchwork socks and your giant fucking red wagon filled with a 20 lb. child and one bunch of carrots. You. look. ridiculous.
They Provide Shopping Carts, You Know
Comments are closed.
You’re a dick.
Wow, the awfulness just oozes right off the screen. Nobody slams Ms. Frizzle like that and gets away with it. The bus is about to shrink you down to the size of that 20-pound child so your nose is forever at the same height of every unwashed private part in the land.
Wow, another Portlander with absolutely no spatial awareness. Last I checked, a Radio Flyer is certainly no wider than an actual grocery cart.
Narc them out next time. There’s gotta be insurance reasons behind this.
You’re generally not allowed to take the shopping cart back home with you.
Grade A rant.
You can be sure Wagon Lady is taking snapshots of every buckled sidewalk slab between Green Zebra and her restored craftsman. As soon as the kid’s in bed she’ll crack a bottle of Oregon Pinot, grab the ol’ MacBook Air and bash out a dozen complaints to the city tip line.
Looks like Chunty is working on a hipster/Portland themed MadLibs game.