You apparently felt the need to say that I “would look prettier if I smiled” as you passed me in the grocery story aisle. Fuck you. How dare you assume that because I’m a woman, I only look “pretty” if I’m meeting your antiquated needs.

You’re an old fucking white man, whom I’m certain has lived a life of unacknowledged privilege and I couldn’t care less (most people say ‘I could care less,’ when it’s actually “couldn’t care less”. If you say “could care less,” it means that you actually care, which goes against the intended meaning) about what you think of me. How about thinking of me as a human? What a fucking concept!

“Prettier if I smiled”… FUCK YOU.

28 replies on “White Guy with Sagging Flesh”

  1. I so badly want to say something snarky and asshole-ish but in cases like this there is no other way to respond but with solidarity. Any fucking cunt on the street who feels the need to impart his little bit of caveman wisdom isn’t worth the cost of the filthy pavement on which he stands. By the way, some folks look downright weird when they fake a smile to appease wannabe rapists, so maybe your best look is whatever one you wear while you ignore these horrid twats. Hooray for you, I, Anon. You clearly have the right attitude.

  2. Next time smile and say, “fuck you, you gross piece of shit!”. It takes some practice in the mirror, but the results are astonishingly spectacular.

  4. Why not view this as an opportunity to be creative? A possible retort: “Why THANK you. And you would look prettier in a gimp mask bent over a barrel at a gay bar.”

  6. It’s equally as annoying as a man when you hear it. And there’s nothing wrong with telling the assholes that say that to fuck off.

  9. I agree, Trayvon. I wrote to Humphrey, and he said they changed it to match that of The Stranger. He also said that the up- and down-voting of comments might come back, but he didn’t make any promises. I think losing that feature make the comments section less fun. You won’t know if anyone even reads your comments… so why bother? Anyway, feel free to let him know what you think.

  11. I’ve also tried attaching a photo to my profile multiple times with no success. Ditching the votes was a horrible idea as well. The Humph must’ve picked some stranger at random at a Starbucks to assist with the web design.

    This shit is bush league. Glad I mad suure to d a thorrough spelllllcheck befo hitin post.

  16. The comments section is the fuel that makes this motor run. Most of the IA posts are like terrible movies whose only redeeming quality was serving as fodder on MST3000. The up-down votes served several good purposes. It’s like Salt without a Straw.

  18. I feel like I’m a puppy being retrained on different paper.
    I/A, you have to realize this person is a possible serial killer. He may be the smiley face killer.

  19. Yea Hump’s you might want to fix the likes, dislikes and edit feature on here, otherwise you won’t be getting the same numbers for those sexy new advertisements that are all over the place. now.

  22. Dude’s a fucking tool, as are all who say shit like that to humans of the female gender. But tying it in to old and white patrimony. So fucking overdone and misplaced. Men of all colors and ages do that douche you thing. But I get it, it’s easier when a dude you wanna bang says it.

  24. The Merc blog has been The-Stranger-zombie-fied, Chunty. Don’t blame Humphrey, he’s been replaced by an alien pod from a distant solar system.

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