The Portland Thorns fell 1-0 to the North Carolina Courage in their season opener on Saturday in North Carolina. COMMENCE SATURDAY SOB FEST

This match was fast-paced, and thanks to the Thorns backline, held to only one Carolina goal. Pressure started early with a drive and a cross from North Carolina’s Jess McDonald in the second minute of the game. Luckily, the crisis was averted when the connection was lost. CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW? CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW? The

The Courage were divisive in their attacking half of the field—showing speed and skill from well-known, experienced players like Lynn Williams, Jess McDonald and Brazilian powerhouse Debinha. Fortunately, the Thorns have a backline thicker than Eugene Levy’s eyebrows. And boy, OH BOY did the Thorns defense need the dexterity and urgency they're known for in the 17th minute, when Courage forward Crystal Dunn made a break for the goal. She slid right past Portland newbie Kelli Hubly, but defender Katherine Reynolds fell right in-step and slowed her down enough so that Sonnet could sweep the ball from her feet and out of bounds. DYNAMIC DEFENSIVE DUO!

SHE CAN'T STOP THEM ALL
It was an afternoon full of driving rain and close calls for the Thorns goalkeeper AD Franch. The Courage registered 12 corner kicks, and some resulted in major chaos in front of the goal. AD is the best of the best in the league and was able to manage the mess, but after halftime, at minute 70, Debinha scored with both fire and fury from the top of the box. After a simple two-touch setup, she blasted the ball nearly through the net. DOUBLE FARTS!

FLASK HALF FULL
Sure, the Thorns possessed the ball during the game, especially in the first half. But Portland only took three shots to Carolina’s 20. This certainly wasn’t the team we saw win the championship back in October, but the 2018 Thorns looked better than I thought they would in their first match. But while losing always sucks, and maybe it’s the excess of rosé on a sunny Sunday talking, I’m still feeling optimistic about the season. I think back to this time last year and remember the Thorns team that started the season looked completely different by the end of the season. I remember how the team ebbed and flowed throughout the year—finding its collective stride and, before anyone got too comfortable, switching it up, changing the pace, and moving the focus.

NKOTBs
Hubly was not the only new face we got to see in red on Saturday. Ifeoma Onumonu registered her first start with the Thorns playing up front. Onumonu previously played for the now dissolved Boston Breakers, and was one of the top rookies of 2017. She looked more than promising through her preseason with the Thorns. And RAINDROPS ON ROSES AND WHISKERS ON KITTENS—my most favorite newbie is another player acquired from the Boston break-up. Midge Purce plays up front with the speed of something fierce. In the words of Tom Jones, “She’s got style, she’s got grace, she’s a winner.” I look forward to seeing how the newcomers mesh and meld with our already solid base of players.

HOPES, DREAMS AND THE NEXT GAME
The Thorns won’t play a home match until Sunday, April 15. Providence Park is getting upgraded with a new field, additional seats, and hopefully some other, not entirely necessary enhancements. (I’ve been dreaming of having miniature horses available to pet at halftime, and a spaghetti and toasted garlic bread plate at concessions. I have voiced my requests via Twitter. Feel free to jump onboard with that. Thanks for your support on this.)

The next Thorns game is against the Red Stars on Saturday, March 31 at 5:15 pm in Chicago. Follow me on twitter @erinjeanius and show your support for miniature horses and spaghetti plates at Providence Park!