Artsy Feb 11, 2011 at 10:13 am

Today in "I Hate You Alison Hallett!"

Wm. Steven Humphrey
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Comments

1
A few weeks ago, I stated in these comments that I hate people who hate corgis.

Let it also be known that I hate people who hate Alison.
on February 11, 2011 at 10:28 AM Report this
2
But if a corgi hated Alison - shit, I don't know what I'd do.
on February 11, 2011 at 10:28 AM Report this
3
i like als-hat and her writing. her stuff is about a zillion times better than andrew tonry (with the exception of his proposal for the white stag/made in oregon/portland oregon sign, i will never forget that one. that's the stuff with staying power).
miguelaron on February 11, 2011 at 10:41 AM Report this
4
That comma-ridden comment reads like the preamble to the Constitution.
tk. on February 11, 2011 at 10:44 AM Report this
5
Alison is a nice name for a lady.
cat & beard on February 11, 2011 at 10:51 AM Report this
6
I think it's better if we keep mocking people for taking their reviews of x seriously.
on February 11, 2011 at 11:02 AM Report this
7
Keep up the good work, Alison.
Reymont on February 11, 2011 at 11:08 AM Report this
8
I hate Alison for beating me at air hockey.
kiala on February 11, 2011 at 11:22 AM Report this
9
I hate Alison for beating me at Scrabble.
Courtney Ferguson on February 11, 2011 at 11:47 AM Report this
10
For the millionth time, bridgeburner,
its "judgment" not "judgement".
Man, that bugs the piss out of me.
That is all.
billyjak on February 11, 2011 at 11:55 AM Report this
11
"...mocking people for taking their reviews of x seriously"? Hey, X was a great band!

No, if I had to guess, Alison has pissed off an actor. Watch yourself. They can bore you to death in five languages.
on February 11, 2011 at 12:02 PM Report this
12
I hated Allison for years. I was a long-time vegetarian, and she seemed to hate on every restaurant that couldn't indulge her never-satiated cravings for all things pork. I would make up mock letters to the editor condemning her for her crazy obsession with pork. I assumed she had a clause in her contract somewhere that insisted all restaurants she visit have pork belly on the menu.
Years later, I'm eating pork. Tasty, delicious pork. But I refuse to give her credit!
jriley on February 11, 2011 at 12:04 PM Report this
13
I hate Alison for her ability to follow through on everything including (but not limited to): college, dinner plans, karaoke plans, nutrition goals, fitness regimens, and blog posts.
kiala on February 11, 2011 at 12:17 PM Report this
14
I hate Alison for being a really nice and pleasant person. That shit is unexcusable.
Graham on February 11, 2011 at 12:19 PM Report this
15
There's only one form of punishment appropriate for Alison's Jew-hatin', pork-lovin' ways: a mandatory gefilte fish addendum to the pork belly clause in her contract.
TSW on February 11, 2011 at 12:24 PM Report this
16
Gefilte? Have you ever tried it? It's matzo bad.
cat & beard on February 11, 2011 at 12:28 PM Report this
17
I hate Alison for not waving hi to me loudly enough as I rode by her while on my way to work, so I wasn't able to wave back.
ROM on February 11, 2011 at 12:30 PM Report this
18
I hate Alison because she has a cute, interesting cat and I only have a mean stray cat that hangs around on the porch.
s.mirk on February 11, 2011 at 12:30 PM Report this
19
I hate Alison for beating me at air hockey AND scrabble.
Ben Coleman on February 11, 2011 at 12:31 PM Report this
20
I hate Alison because it sure beats hating myself.
Joe Streckert on February 11, 2011 at 12:43 PM Report this
21
I actually kind of liked her until I found out she was an art criminal. You can just never tell...
Todd Mecklem on February 11, 2011 at 12:50 PM Report this
22
Sorry, billyjak, but I have to question your judgement...

http://www.dailywritingtips.com/judgement-…
Todd Mecklem on February 11, 2011 at 12:53 PM Report this
23
I plan to offer Alison a cameo role in the pilot of my new TV series, "CSI: Art Crime Unit."
MightyToyCannon on February 11, 2011 at 1:10 PM Report this
24
I do not hate Alison Hallett. I fear her.
Bobby Roberts on February 11, 2011 at 1:12 PM Mercury Staff
25
Why is this news? Alison has been committing art crime as long as there has been art. For example, she made Van Gogh kill himself after she bit off his ear.
Commenty Colin on February 11, 2011 at 1:20 PM Report this
26
@CC I remember when that happened! It was on Defamer.
kiala on February 11, 2011 at 1:27 PM Report this
27
Alison Hallett wrote the Sit/Lie Ordinance.
Reymont on February 11, 2011 at 2:03 PM Report this
28
Alison Hallett supplied the urine for "Piss Christ," and drew pork chops on everyone's plates in "The Last Supper."
Commenty Colin on February 11, 2011 at 2:23 PM Report this
29
If Alison were a movie she'd be Larry The Cable Guy: Health Inspector.

If Alison were a restaurant she'd be Javier's Taco Shop.

If Alison were a book she'd be The Boz: Confessions of a Modern Anti-Hero
http://amzn.to/eydIdm

If Alison were a phrase from 10 years ago she'd be "Talk to the hand!"

If Alison were a phrase from today she'd be "First world problems!"

If Alison were a juice she'd be Cabbage.

If Alison were a band she'd be Papa Roach.

If Alison were a mole she'd have a long, black hair sticking out of it.
TSW on February 11, 2011 at 3:04 PM Report this
30
I hate the "If Alison" 's TSW wrote. That's what we're doing right?
kiala on February 11, 2011 at 3:10 PM Report this
31
@TSW I actually did a book report on "The Boz: Confessions of a Modern Anti-Hero" in sixth grade. I got a C-minus.

I hate Alison for not letting me review that book in her precious Arts section.
ezra on February 11, 2011 at 3:22 PM Report this
32
This is begging for an "I Am Alison Hallett" photoshop contest.
Rob on February 11, 2011 at 3:25 PM Report this
33
There's a writer here named Alison?
Fruit Cup on February 11, 2011 at 5:40 PM Report this

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