Rob Simonsen

After watching Kobe Bryant sabotage his team twice in recent weeks, dragging himself up and down the court and jacking terrible three after even more terrible three, seeing an old ass Dirk Nowitzki carry his Dallas Mavericks to victory was a welcome change. Take that, Father Time. The difference with Dirk was that he picked […]

There was a time when a game against the Lakers meant something. When Kobe Bryant instilled fear in the hearts of every Portland fan. When the team was good and dominant and relevant. This is not that time. The Lakers are the saddest franchise this side of the 76ers. Coach Byron Scott is doing his […]

Everyone is going to have a bad shooting night now and then, even Damian Lillard. Sometimes you eat the bar, and sometimes the bar goes a Kobe-esque 4-22 from the floor. That’s not to pin this loss on Lillard by any means—he kept the offense running and nearly messed around and got a triple double […]

As soon as it was announced yesterday morning that the Houston Rockets had fired their coach, Kevin McHale, last night’s game had trouble written all over it. Houston had been asleep at the wheel for their first eleven games, dropping seven of them in frustrating fashion. James Harden looked like he was still drunk in […]

After dropping two straight, the Blazers came into tonight ready to play. The sting of two losses was the all the motivation Portland needed to… Nah, just kidding. Tonight was LaMarcus Aldridge’s first game back in the Moda Center since bolting for San Antonio. The Blazers were fired up to go against the second-best Blazer […]

For those you that watched Portland’s other team advance to the Western Conference Finals last night, you missed one of the more epic collapses you’re likely to see on a basketball court. A complete and total meltdown from Portland, who erased three quarters of solid basketball with one quarter of complete madness. Okay, so first, […]

Nearly all game the Blazers seemed in danger of giving this one away. They coughed up 19 turnovers. They finished a paltry 15-32 from the free throw line. They gave up 16 offensive rebounds. Those are the exact sort of miscues you’d expect from a younger team, and normally they would spell doom against one […]

A Portland loss was all but written before the night had even started. Prior to tonight’s game the Minnesota Timberwolves paid tribute to Flip Saunders—their coach and president of basketball operations—who passed away just over a week ago after complications with Hodgkin lymphoma. It was going to be an emotional night for all involved, with […]

Welp, so much for that promising start. Welcome to the life of a lottery team, where one game you can look like world-beaters, the next…not so much. It’s going to be an up and down season. Sometimes the ups outnumber the downs, but not in Blazerland. After taking care of business in the home opener […]

Opening night adrenaline? Wanting to prove the doubters wrong? Whatever the reason, the Blazers came into tonight ready to roll. Once “Close Your Eyes (And Count to Fuck)” started ripping pre-game, it was on. White shirts for all? Check. Light up glow sticks? Check. Cool new LED tunnel for the player intros? Check. Thank the […]