You. Old lady with the bright blue eye-shadow, who almost sideswiped me on my bike this morning…
I believe you were wrong, in the assertion you made, in our brief (yet heated) debate when I caught up with you at the stop light of NE 20th and Broadway. You claimed that I should have stayed “over to the right” and that I need to “yield to oncoming traffic” instead of pulling into the middle of the road when trying to avoid a parked car which had two other old women getting out of it, whom I believe (ironically enough) were going to a fucking funeral.
For you, my fellow Portlander, I would like to quote this passage from the official Oregon Bicyclist Manual :
Riding on the right doesn’t mean hugging the curb or edge of the road. This may not be the best place to ride. For example, if you hit the curb, you could lose your balance and fall into traffic. Other times when you shouldn’t ride too far to the right include:
• When avoiding parked cars or surface hazards.
• When a lane is too narrow for a bicycle and vehicle to travel safely side by side.
• When making a left turn.
• To avoid conflicts with right-turning cars.
• On a one-way street, you may ride on the left as long as you are riding with traffic.
Booyashaka lady. Booyashaka.
But seriously folks, I’m not trying to be a dick here. I’m just saying we could all stand to be a little nicer on the road. And we could all (drivers and cyclists alike) stand to take a look at the Oregon Bicyclist Manual as well as the Oregon Driver Manual and know a little more about these two different forms of transportation and how they are meant to interact.
Thanks, Noah. It’s been too long since we’ve had a good bikes v. cars rehash around here.
COMMENCE REHASHING YOUR TIRED POSITIONS:
Bikes rule!
Cars rule!
There’s right, and there’s dead right!
Bikers are fancy hipster dum dums!
Drivers are lazy earth-raping buttholes!
Roads were built for cars!
Bikes are legally allowed to use the roads, even in ways that cars are not, on occasion!
It’s funnier if you imagine it’s two bears yelling at each other.
Well, I guess there’s nothing left to add.
WAIT!!!
U-LOCK JUSTICE MUTHATRUCKAS!!!
Your highway is my sidewalk!
MY MOTHER DOESN’T HUG ME ENOUGH!!
wait…
I DRIVE A DODGE STRATUS!
SLOG covered this a bit today too:
http://slog.thestranger.com/slog/archives/…
My other car is a data packet.
Your sidewalk is my bike lane!
There is mascara in your bike lanes!
Wait, does old-lady mascara come in bright blue? Do you mean eye shadow? I mean come on, let’s please get the facts straight here. Have the standards already started to tumble, before Matt Davis’ chair has even had a chance to cool?
Did you suddenly move to the left without looking behind you while the car was approaching without signaling or at least making eye contact with the driver, because, god forbid you shouldn’t lose your precious momentum by scrubbing some speed and waiting for an opening in traffic.
If not, enjoy your smugness.
Indcutee,
You’re right. It was eye shadow. I made the change. Good catch.
IF IT AIN’T FIXED, IT’S BROKEN!
I liked this piece until the part where you tried to get cyclists and drivers to get along.
Noah,
To clarify: I was TOTALLY kidding :). Hope you didn’t feel picked-upon by me. I’ll leave that to the mean old ladies with poor taste in makeup.
Dodge Stratus comment made me laugh the most.
I’ve been virtually run down by cyclists. Twice. As a pedestrian. Walking in the crosswalk.
Speaking as a pedestrian? Both cyclists and drivers need to cool out.
here’s a fresh debate to take sides on:
wigs v. helmets
which one is ACTUALLY going to prevent personal injury on the road? bonus question:
does anyone know where i can buy wigs in NE PDX?
p.s. noah you left your wig at my house on wednesday night. which means you probably weren’t wearing it during your little altercation this morning. tsk tsk.
DK