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Mayor Wheelers office considers downtown homeless ban that would push the unhoused into a mass camp.
Mayor Wheeler's office considers downtown homeless ban that would push the unhoused into a mass camp. Dirk Vanderhart

GOOD MORNING, PORTLAND! I'm so in love with you, I'll be forever blue. What religion or reason could drive a man to forsake his lover? LET'S GO TO PRESS.

IN LOCAL NEWS:

• Undoubtedly due to increasing pressure from the wealthy business community, Mayor Wheeler has been discussing the possibility of banning homeless camping downtown and moving them all into a "high-population outdoor camping zone." To the surprise of no one, this terrible, potentially devastating plan is getting serious pushback from activists and fellow politicians. Our Alex Zielinski has more on this troubling scheme as well as some thoughts on who might be behind it.

• Today in "HMMMMMMMMM...": As yesterday's vaccine mandate deadline for state workers came and went, it appears that while Washington state allowed 6.8 percent of employees to claim religious exemptions, Oregon approved almost double that many exemptions at 11 percent. In response, God said, "WOW, you people are gullible."

• Vancouver resident Kfin Karuo has been identified as the third person of color to be shot and killed by Clark County Sheriff’s deputies this year, and once again under mysterious circumstances. Officers claim he had a gun and tried to elude them, but apparently there are no witnesses or footage of the shooting.

• Related: For those who are concerned about the dangerous, misleading narrative being pushed by Portland's wealthy business leaders and the police union, READ THIS THREAD:

• Candidates are lining up to fill the Metro Council District 6 seat after former Councilor Bob Stacey left the position due to health issues, and Duncan Hwang, community advocate and interim co-director of the Asian Pacific American Network of Oregon (APANO), is one of those candidates. Find out more about him in this story from our Isabella Garcia!

• Are you a music lover who previously enjoyed going to live shows, but are too nervous to attend one right now? You may want to check out this review of the recent Yo La Tengo concert by our Alex Zielinski who relates her experience... that turned out a lot better than expected!

IN NATIONAL/WORLD NEWS:

• The White House has unveiled their plan to vaccinate 28 million kids ages 5-11 from the coronavirus, pending approval from the FDA which should happen within weeks. Rather than mass distribution sites, the kids will be encouraged to get their shots from their doctors, at pharmacies, or perhaps even at their schools.

• Nikolas Cruz has pleaded guilty to murdering 17 people in 2018 at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland, Florida. A coming penalty trial will determine whether Cruz will be sentenced to death or life in prison without parole.

• The House Committee investigating the January 6 domestic terrorist attack on the nation's capitol has unanimously voted to hold former White House aide/walking turnip Steve Bannon in contempt for defying their subpoena. The full House will vote on the measure, and if approved, the matter will be referred to the Justice Department who will decide whether or not to throw his traitorous, turnip ass in jail. Meanwhile, committee member and Republican Liz Cheney suggests that Bannon's defiance indicates that Trump was "personally involved in the planning and execution of January 6th."

• Prior to today's scheduled walkout by trans and LGBTQ+ employees, Netflix's CEO Ted Sarandos admits he "screwed up" in the way he blatantly defended Dave Chappelle's transphobia in his standup special The Closer—but he's still not removing the show from the service.

• Today in SCIENCE!: A pig's kidney has been successfully transplanted into a human body—and no, not through the mouth, which is the way I usually eat my kidneys.

• Get ready for the fun fright of your life with SLAY—the Mercury's short HORROR film fest coming at ya online from Oct 22-31, and LIVE and IN-PERSON at the Clinton Street Theater on Oct 29 & 30! GET THOSE TICKETS NOW.

• And now... THE WEATHER REPORT: Showers return today with a high of 60!

• And finally, move over Squid Game, now there's "Squad Games."