As further proof that all writers need editors, there’s this story from the Guardian about controversial lightning rod author Jonathan Franzen who “once considered adopting an Iraqi war orphan to help him understand young people better, but was persuaded against it by his editor.” First of all, THANK YOU NAMELESS EDITOR. You certainly earned your paycheck that day. Secondly, THANK YOU SMARTASSES OF TWITTER, who also came up with some good conversations between Franzen and his editor.
Franzen: I’m going to teach an island full of genetically mutated animals to write.
Editor: Have you considered yoga?
#failedfranzenplans
— Justina Ireland (@tehawesomersace) August 21, 2015
Franzen: I want to dress up like a bat and fight —
Editor: Yeah, I’m gonna stop you right there.
#FailedFranzenPlans
— Fred Coppersmith (@unrealfred) August 21, 2015
MORE AFTER THE JUMP…
Franzen: What do cats feel? Do they cry? Do they love?
Editor: Here’s a Garfield comic.
Franzen: I HATE MONDAYS NOW.
#FailedFranzenPlans
— Jen (@Pop_Reader) August 21, 2015
J: I want to live in Buckingham Palace!
Editor: How about we go to Burger King?
J: YAY! #failedfranzenplans pic.twitter.com/rylrGxYQzo
— heidi heilig (@heidiheilig) August 21, 2015
Franzen: I want to dip turtles in radioactive material.
Editor: Here are some action figures.
#FailedFranzenPlans
— Tristina Wright (@TristinaWright) August 21, 2015
Franzen: I want to buy an island and clone dinosaurs and then open a theme park.
Editor: Look, Natural History Museum!
#FailedFranzenPlans
— Justina Ireland (@tehawesomersace) August 21, 2015
