Don’t you just hate it when you leave a party early, and for weeks afterward, have to endure your friends endlessly recounting all the drama you missed? That’s pretty much what’s been happening to me ever since I got the hell outta Dodge and left Humboldt County, California a few weeks ago. Just a couple […]
Crime
Posted inFood and Drink
Sunday Night Pig Fight
It seems we’ve already found a theme for the week: Heritage Pig Breeds and the People Who Love Them. The Willamette Week‘s Kelly Clark has the scoop on a bizarre altercation that took place last Sunday night after the hoity-toity pig throwdown Cochon 555, leading to the arrest of chef Eric Bechard and Cochon 555 […]
Posted inCrime
Who Would Torch a Toyota Tercel?
Fire investigators are sorting through the ashes of four mysterious arsons last night in Southeast Portland, where four apparently random cars were torched between 2:30 and 4:30 AM. The Oregonian has the details: The first, at 2:30 a.m., left a 2004 Ford van burning outside NW Saw & Tool at the corner of Southeast Yamhill […]
Posted inCrime
“Mad Hatter” Carjacker on the Loose!
This alert just in from the Portland Police Bureau: [Last night] at 8:35 p.m., Portland Police were called to the Safeway parking lot at Southeast Cesar Chavez and 39th on a call of a car being stolen at gunpoint. Officers confirmed that a victim had her 1993 light blue Eagle Vision stolen at gunpoint. The […]
Posted inBikes
Guilty: The New York Police Officer Who Allegedly Shoved a Critical Mass Rider
Remember this? It’s led to this: A former police officer was convicted on Thursday of lying about a confrontation with a bicyclist who was participating in a Critical Mass bike rally in Times Square in 2008 — a collision that was videotaped and became a viral presence on the Internet. The officer, Patrick Pogan, 24, […]
Posted inCats
Cat Named After Twilight Character Attacks Family
Thank you thank you thank you to Skanner news editor LisaLoving for this tweet: Which led to this story accompanied by this photo: I read through the whole story about the cat named after a Twilight character who one day flips her shit and attacks her human family, and the main question it raised for […]
Posted inCrime
Boy Scout Awarded $1.4 Million in Sex Abuse Case
Lewis, right, and attorney Kelly Clark, outside the courtroom this morning. I’m here on the fifth floor of Multnomah County courthouse, in the courtroom of Judge John Wittmayer. The room was packed with reporters and onlookers as the jury filed back into the room this morning to announce their decision in the first phase of […]
Posted inCats
“Henriksen, Davis, Horton, Implicated in ‘Kitten Hazing’ Ring”
That’s what the headline would read if I had any proof to back up what most of us already know in our hearts: That my fellow 2010 Barfly Award Nominees for Most Good Writer are kitten hazers. Just one look in their eyes and it becomes clear that while, yes, they may know how to […]
Posted inCrime
BREAKING: Ninjas On the Loose in West Linn
West Linn police are on the scenes of two related overnight robberies that began when three robbers disguised as ninjas broke into a home late Thursday afternoon. Police say the robbers rang the bell at a row house in the 2200-block of St. Moritz Loop in West Linn around 5 p.m. When a woman answered […]
Posted inCrime
Could The Pope Be Indicted, Arrested, Tried, Convicted and Imprisoned?
Sadly, no—but the lying, rapist-coddling bastard may yet have to resign: Top Vatican officials—including the future Pope Benedict XVI—did not defrock a priest who molested as many as 200 deaf boys, even though several American bishops repeatedly warned them that failure to act on the matter could embarrass the church, according to church files newly […]
Posted inPuppy
Friday Afternoon Puppy Scam!
This is serious business, guys. I just got a letter from the state attorney general’s office. It concerns puppies. Puppy crime! You’ve been warned! “DON’T FALL FOR THE SCAM WITH THE PUPPY DOG EYES!” says the email from John Kroger’s office. Yes, in all caps. The scam-a-lot alert warns Oregonians against emails advertising free puppies. […]