MONDAY, JULY 10 This week begins with another defeat for our dark lord and master, SATAN. Today, one of our brother practitioners of the unholy arts by the name of Jay Scott Ballinger, got his ass in a wringer by pleading guilty in federal court to burning down 26 churches over a five-year period. According […]
One Day at a Time
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The Week in Review
MONDAY, JULY 3 The entire city of Portland took a long, hot shower today in an attempt to wash away the dirty feelings caused by Pat Buchanan’s visit to the City of Roses on Sunday. A shoe-in for the Reform party Presidential nomination, Buchanan enthralled an audience consisting of 35 people (HAW! HAW!) at the […]
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One Day at a Time
The Week in Review
MONDAY, JUNE 26 Recently, One Day at A Time exposed a ring of Portland based terrorists, operating under the governmental alias of “the City Street Car Project.” Their goal: to eradicate Portland’s bicyclists by laying streetcar tracks, entrapping tires and causing bloody, perhaps fatal crashes. But it gets far more insidious! As it turns out, […]
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One Day at a Time
The Week in Review
MONDAY, JUNE 19 It’s Monday, and GOD is already taking a beating. According to The New York Times, the Supreme Court put the kibbosh today on public praying at high school football games. Back in March, the Santa Fe School District argued that if students were not allowed to express religious views at the games, […]
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One Day at a Time
The Week in Review
MONDAY, JUNE 12 One Day at a Time has uncovered a potential multi-million dollar scandal in which Tri-Met, the Portland Police, the Oregon Citizens Alliance, City Hall, Sellwood Cycles, the Czech Republic and the Lesbian Avengers have collaborated to kill Portland road bikers–one by innocent one. One Day became suspicious after enduring two near-fatal crashes […]
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One Day at a Time
The Week in Review
MONDAY, JUNE 5 Charles Easterby was shocked today to discover two policemen at his gallery door, Everett Station Loft #102 (625 NW Everett) begging him to take down his nudie pictures. Easterby put up his photos (depicting a very handsome man who happens to be hung like an elephant trunk) for first Thursday and planned […]
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One Day at a Time
The Week in Review
MONDAY, MAY 29 A leg that was lost, now is found. Here’s the sad (and later, happy!) story: When Joshua Fadness was a year old, his leg was amputated below the knee to remove a cancerous tumor, and has since been forced to wear a prosthetic leg. Six years later, while playing with schoolmates in […]
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One Day at a Time
The Week in Review
MONDAY, MAY 22 Pornography and cable television–the twin avengers of free speech–continued the good fight for the First Amendment. The Supreme Court voted today to strike down a provision that limits access to adult programming on cable television. The winning suit, brought by Playboy’s cable affiliate, knocked out the provision of the Telecommunications Act that […]