In this week’s printed paper, thanks to Paramount Pictures’ peculiar decision to skip over Portland’s army of critics until after our deadline, you’ll find an odd artifact standing in for our regular review of Star Trek Into Darkness. It’s a review written from Britain, where the movie opened days ago, by old Mercury hand Matt […]
United Federation of Planets
Posted inUnited Federation of Planets
Captain Picard Day: 2013 EDITION
Captain Picard Day, AS WE ALL KNOW, is the best starday of the year, even if Captain Picard doesn’t like it. Hey, Captain Picard! You get to spend every day as a captain! And we all love you! So shut up and stop whining just because one dumb starday doesn’t go exactly as you’d like! […]
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Here are Two Star Trek Clips That I Have Not Seen!
So I hope they don’t have, like, Kirk being really racist to Chekov or anything in them. That seems unlikely? I don’t know. Young Kirk is kind of a dick, it could happen. Anyway, Star Trek Into Darkness is coming out soon, and I’m very excited, and I’m going to be seeing it regardless—which means […]
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Reminder: Wrath of Khan in 35mm!
We mentioned it in My, What a Busy Week! and Film Shorts, but hey, reminder: The Hollywood’s got a 35mm print of Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan playing through Thursday, and you should go! It’s a fantastic movie—even if you don’t like Star Trek, you will like this movie—and seeing it on the […]
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Netflix Sure Is Giving People A Lot of Bad Ideas
STAR TREK: ENTERPRISE FEEL THE EXCITEMENT! Thanks to things like the Veronica Mars Kickstarter and Netflix’s resurrection of Arrested Development, people are getting a whole lot of ideas about how to make a whole lot of terrible things. STOP IT, PEOPLE. YOUR TERRIBLE THINGS DIED FOR A REASON. Netflix is not your Etsy. Case in […]
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Headline of the Day: “IRS Regrets Making Star Trek Video”
Of the five-minute video, which cost $60,000 to produce: The Star Trek video was shot at the IRS’s in-house studio in Maryland on a set faithfully depicting the command bridge of the starship “Enterprise.” IRS employees in the roles of Mr. Spock and the show’s other familiar characters, declare themselves on route to the planet […]
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There’s a New Star Trek Trailer, So That’s What I’ll Be Watching for the Entirety of This Morning
The new Star Trek trailer features a whole lot of Sherlock being grumpy, Kirk being badass, RoboCop, Alice Eve being mostly naked, Sherlock being grumpy some more, and so much srs bsns, heavy-duty gravitas that one suspects J.J. Abrams might’ve forgotten that what made his first Star Trek so much fun was that it was, […]
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ALERT: Do Not Buy Your Next Bat’leth from This Man
To say nothing of the Sword of Valen. WANTED Not pictured: a flute Spotted last night at a bar in SE Portland. Thanks to Mark for the heads up.
Posted inUnited Federation of Planets
One Nerd to Rule Them All: J.J. Abrams “Closing the Deal” to Direct Star Wars
image via News coming in from around the nerdternets: J.J. Abrams is closing in on a deal to direct the next Star Wars movie. (WHAAAAA???!!!?!1) Disney isn’t confirming anything yet, but hey, the Hollywood Reporter is pretty reliable, right? Sources confirm to The Hollywood Reporter that the Star Trek director is negotiating to direct Episode […]
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A Future… OF NIGHTMARES
Via io9. #smallcontactlenselefteyePOINT #thumbswayup
Posted inUnited Federation of Planets
More of J.J. Abrams Continues to Taunt Nerds, Still Won’t Let Anybody Know Who Benedict Cumberbatch Is Really Playing for Some Annoying Reason
I have it on reputable authority that the nine minutes of Star Trek Into Darkness that were shown before certain IMAX screenings of The Hobbit this weekend—and which were supposed to be available only before certain IMAX screenings of The Hobbit—might have found their way online, and might be awesome. I leave you to it, […]
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Here’s Your Trailer for Star Trek: The Wrath of Benedict Cumberbatch
Last night I came home from the Mercury‘s annual drunken holiday karaoke party to find (1) humiliation and shame and (2) the first trailer for the new Star Trek movie! Let’s not analyze the preceding sentence too closely, and instead just move on to the trailer, shall we? Much like its title, and its poster, […]