Now, I’m not the kind of guy to give advice to cops on how to do their jobs (I’ll leave that to our very knowledgeable commenters). However, I can’t help but think that maybe some of the cops’ recent troubles may have been lessened if they had only watched the following completely radical old-school police training video. I’m pretty sure this guy could’ve taken out Steven Seagal and Chuck Norris! (Dear Cops: If you have a mustache like that? I’ll let you kick my ass AND feel it up!)

Hat tips to Everything is Terrible!

Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)

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