Okay, this news is from June, but somehow I hadn’t heard about it until just recently.

Various strange business issues are occurring behind the scenes with Portland’s Favorite BeerTM, Pabst Blue Ribbon.

FACT!
PBR was sold last year to a billionaire whose last name is Metropoulos who says employees should consider working for the family “to be an honor.”

FACT!
The billionaire Metropouloses want to completely overhaul the style of marketing that made PBR successful in recent years (exhibit A) and move the company headquarters from Illinois to Los Angeles.

FACT!
Part of the new marketing scheme involves bringing “glamour and celebrity sponsorships to such Pabst brands as Old Milwaukee and Schlitz.”

OPINION!
This is doomed.

Sarah Shay Mirk reported on transportation, sex and gender issues, and politics at the Mercury from 2008-2013. They have gone on to make many things, including countless comics and several books.

14 replies on “PBR Must Die”

  2. Well, you are obviously an authority on corporate businesses and their marketing campaigns and executive structure. I’m sure your opinion will weigh heavily on the industry.

  5. I’ll be glad if the Urban Outfitters of beer finally show their true colors as a corporation and stopped trying (wildly successfully) to hoodwink people with tactics like paying sell-out street artists to paint billboards in the guise of murals to distract suckers from the fact that when they buy PBR they’re drinking Miller/Coors-produced beer.

  10. Pabst is shit. Everyone who drinks it knows they are drinking shit. Right? Pabst jumped the shark at least 4yrs ago, but it sure made a nice come back in the form of morning Pabst Farts.

  11. Fuck Pabst. I’ve been saying that since people started fetishizing shit beer. There was a time when it was easy to find Henry’s at a bar – which is about 64764756757% better and costs – what – a dime more? Then everyone decided that the cool thing was to import swill from thousands of miles away and replace the much, much, better stuff made in Hood River.

    Henry’s should be to Portland as Guinness is to Ireland. But I guess some hipster jackoffs had the financial power to change out cheaper beers to be something way shittier.

    Fuck Pabst.

  12. Most of the Weinhard’s brands are made at the Miller plant in Irwindale, CA. The stuff with wheat or organic ingredients is made by Full Sail. Private Reserve is a product of Los Angeles!

  13. That’s true – a lot of Henry’s is made in California…still about half as far from Portland as PBR, and still working as an analogy as Guinness to Ireland as most Guinness isn’t made in Dublin.

    And, most importantly, a few cents more than PBR and 64764756757% better. You can’t argue with science.

  14. I don’t like either beer. And I suppose some of the Weinhards are still made in Oregon. But really, if I want that “cheap beer” flavor, I just get sessions. Otherwise, life is too short, drink great beer if you can afford it.

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