It’s a sad, but true fact that the standards of modern pedophiles are sinking lower and lower. Thanks to the average child’s increased awareness of sexual predators, perverts are now forced to choose really ugly ones to molest. As proof, check out this PSA from the ’80s, in which a series of creepy dad types use their bizarre electrical powers to bone a child who looks kind of like the kid from Mask. Sadly, this will be the closest thing the kid will ever have to a positive sexual experience.

Hat tips to Everything is Terrible!

https://youtube.com/watch?v=dxAndD9lVqM%26hl%3Den%26fs%3D1%26

Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)

7 replies on “Some Pedophiles Really Have Low Standards”

  5. OK, it’s bizarre and bad. But are women’s rape crisis campaigns funny too?
    Do non consensual sex abuse and assault count as sex?

  6. Dude! Thats from the old saturday morning show about Sea Monkees that are enlarged to people size! I’ve never been able to convince anyone that it ever existed!

  7. I’m not offended…just confused. What was with the egg and goldfish situation at the end? And the guy mowing his lawn with the shirt off? I…what?

Comments are closed.