Face it, you’re too amped up to go home and watch election results alone! So come to the FREE Mercury Election Night Wing-a-ding-ding (Party) tonight at the Doug Fir! Here is what you’ll get:

Live election coverage on the big screen!
Smarty-pants analysis from smarty-pants Steve Novick!
Games, prizes, party-favors, and a “Mormon Magic Underpants” fashion show!
Comedy from Ian Karmel!
Especially special special guests!
Dancey dance music from DJ Gregarious!
Drink specials!
Binders full of women!
And me, your host, Wm. Steven Humphrey!

Trust me, it’s gonna get wild, y’all—SO DON’T MISS IT!

Mercury‘s Election Night Wing-a-Ding-Ding (Party)
TONIGHT: Tuesday, Nov 6
Doors at 6 pm, Entertainment at 8 pm
Doug Fir, 830 E Burnside
ABSOLUTELY FREE!!

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Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)

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