It hurts to be beaten by a girl, doesn't it, Donald Trump? DOESN'T IT? Credit: Gage Skidmore via Wikimedia Commons
It hurts to be beaten by a girl, doesnt it, Donald Trump? DOESNT IT?
It hurts to be beaten by a girl, doesn’t it, Donald Trump? DOESN’T IT? Gage Skidmore via Wikimedia Commons

In a statement that made me want to procure one of those Mad Max person-muzzles for a certain “presidential” “candidate,” Donald Trump today said some pretty fucked-up things in what sounded to some like a bizarre suggestion that his opponent, former Secretary of State Hillary Rodham Clinton, be assassinated. His comments were met with outrage—although, honestly, we’re talking about a man who has ties to militant antiabortion activists and by numerous accounts seems to hate women, and is also an alleged rapist—and when I remember that, everything about him makes a terrible kind of sense.

I don’t want to dwell on what Trump said, because it is garbage and because he’s surely going to just laugh it off as a “joke,” kind of like how it’s a joke when someone says “I hate you and hope you die in a house fire… JUST KIDDING!”

That’s behavior I wouldn’t tolerate in a nine-year-old. In a “presidential” “candidate,” it is legitimately disturbing.

So, let’s enjoy the responses from the level-headed among us, because if we dwell on the burnt-orange narcissist himself, the emotional terrorists win.

Elizabeth Warren just calls it like it is. What a gem among humans:

As always, Sara Benincasa’s commentary is on point:

Here’s former Congresswoman Gabby Giffords

And comedian Cameron Esposito, who, AHEM, knows what a joke actually is:

Anyway, here’s a reason ol’ Trumppence might be feeling a little grouchy today:

I rest my case.