Which is not to ask if you can tackle a souffle without breaking a sweat. No, I mean, do you have actual balls? You know, testicles?
Oysters in the Rocky Mountains? You don’t say!
No? Then don’t bother downloading the worlds first multimedia all testicle cookbook, written by Ljubomir Erovic. The Testicle Cookbook: Cooking With Balls has recipes that range from barbecued testicles to battered testicles. Yes, battered testicles. Ouch.
Testicles have been enjoyed by many of the worlds peoples for centuries. Even here in the good ‘ol U.S. of A., bull testicles are a backwoods mainstay. They are generally billed as Rocky mountain Oysters and from what I hear, they aint that bad.
Maybe testicles are the food of the future: cheap, easy to prepare, purported aphrodisiac. According to Mr. Erovic, ostrich testicles are the best for flavor, while stallion testicles top the charts for testosterone content and thus, Viagra-like qualities.
Here are some tips for testes preparation, as explained by Erovic in an interview with London’s Daily Mail:
“Wash testicles thoroughly for 30-45 minutes,” begins the recipe for testicles pie.
“Once softened, mince them in a mincer.”
A “very sharp knife” is needed for traditional style testicles, which get boiled, cut up and
deep fried in hot oil.
How easy. Where do you find testicles? I bet if you gave Viande Meats & Sausages 24 hours they could come up with some pretty amazing balls. Testicle party, anyone?
have you not heard of the world famous testicle festival outside of Missoula, MT??