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GOOD MORNING, PORTLAND! Say goodbye to the poor quality air, because much needed rainfall should be coming to town around noon today, and continuing on and off through the weekend. Now let's sniff some good to moderate quality NEWS!


• Deeply unqualified (and weirdly cruel) candidate for city council Rene Gonzalez has gotten slapped with an ADDITIONAL fine (on top of the $77,000 for accepting deeply discounted office and parking space from Jordan Schnitzer, and then hiding it) for breaking election rules—this time from the city's auditor office:

[PSST! I was thinking of publishing a different reason every day for NOT voting for Rene Gonzalez in our newsblasts... but look! It happens naturally!]

• Speaking of people and things you do and DON'T want to vote for:

• Mayor Ted Wheeler is expected to give a press conference today to announce a series of plans to address Portland's homeless crisis, which reportedly include phasing out unsanctioned camping over the next 18 months, building three sites that will hold 150-500 houseless people, creating a voluntary diversion program for those who commit low-level crimes and infractions (including violating the coming camping ban), and creating 20,000 new affordable housing units by 2033. Of course this all depends on getting funding and cooperation from multiple city, county, and state entities. And maybe... nothing will happen at all! Tune in later for more details.

• Yesterday workers at New Seasons' Slabtown store voted 62-14 to unionize, making them the second shop to join the growing New Seasons Labor Union. Our Alex Zielinski has the deets.

• Supporters of the recently maligned Portland Clean Energy Fund applauded the program's proposed structural changes put forward by City Council—but, but, BUT! They also warned city leaders not to dilute the original intention of the voter-approved fund. Our Isabella Garcia has more.

• Hey, brainy butts!  It's time for the super fun POP QUIZ PDX. This week's trivia quiz includes presidents lickin' ice cream, which candidates NOT to vote for (guess who), and the best named cats at the Oregon Humane Society! Meow, LET'S DO THIS. 😻

• If you're a music lover, you don't wanna miss Jenni Moore's newest edition of HEAR IN PORTLAND. This week: Portland-based Rapper Epp's excellent new LP FOLD, and Lollipop Shoppe shows off the new face of the old Dig A Pony space!


• Today in HA-HA-HAAAAAA: Trump crony/human turnip Steve Bannon has been sentenced to four months in prison (and a $6,500 fine) for ignoring a subpoena ordering him to appear before Congress to testify about his role in the January 6 domestic terrorist attack on the nation's capitol.

• Following the rise and the startling quick fall of British Prime Minister Liz Truss, conservative candidates are lining up to snatch the job... which includes scandal-prone former PM Boris Johnson?

• Just when you think Twitter couldn't get much worse, a new report indicates that if billionaire crybaby Elon Musk buys the social media platform, he will fire 75 percent of the staff, leaving it with a skeleton crew.

• A jury has cleared actor Kevin Spacey of sexual battery charges leveled at him by Anthony Rapp, who was 14 when he said the actor assaulted him. (Though Spacey has more such charges to answer to.)

• And finally... here's your HAPPY FRIDAY DANCE!