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GOOD MORNING, PORTLAND! And hey! You need a laugh tonight, right? Then get your tickets NOW for tonight's absolutely hilarious interactive live game show, TWO EVILS with Arlo Weierhauser and Kate Murphy, in which you compete against this month's special guest comedian Kirsten Kuppenbender (from Lez Stand Up) for fabulous prizes! AND if you bring a can of food to donate to Urban Gleaners, you'll be entered to win a wondrous RAFFLE PRIZE! It's tonight, Wednesday, November 8, at the Siren Theater, so don't miss it! And now, here's your daily wondrous prize of NEWS.


• BIG NEWS: Portland's cruel (and thoughtess!) camping ban—which will make houseless people pack up their stuff every day and move, and without having enough places to go—is set to be enforced starting this Monday, November 15... BUT! Tomorrow a Multnomah County judge is scheduled to rule on whether the ban should be paused due to its potential unconstitutionality, and until a trial can finally decide the matter. (This must be very frustrating to commissioners such as Rene Gonzalez, who believes his reelection hinges on being the cruelest commish of them all!)

• We are now on day five of the Portland teachers strike—and nope, there's currently no end in sight. And it looks like the troubles for PPS are just starting as two other school unions have requested mediation with PPS, which could lead to yet another strike down the road! Our Taylor Griggs has more. 

• As you know, the Department of Justice has been on the Portland Police Bureau's ass since 2014 (!), first following their violent behavior against those in mental distress, and later because of their violent behavior toward (waves hands in the air) everyone. But a switch has been flipped. Now the DOJ is recommending that Portland adopt an independent monitor to watch over the bureau and keep them clean. But is it because the DOJ is exhausted by the bureau's inability to change, or because they've changed just enough? Our Courtney Vaughn digs into the details.

• Speaking of cops, the city council, and their mutual corruption, Portland's commissioners are once again trying to overrule the will of the people by gutting the voter-approved (and much tougher) police accountability board, whose job is to investigate and discipline cop misconduct. The council wants to chop important aspects of the board's work, including taking all hearings behind closed doors, reducing the number of board members, insisting that participants have no opinion either way about policing before being appointed, forcing board members to go on "ride alongs" with cops, and a lot more bullshit intended to sway the board's investigations. Reminder: This independent board was approved by 82 percent of voters. But our council really doesn't give a fuck what you think, do they? VOTE THEM ALL OUT WITH GUSTO.

• With his new album, When the Night, Oregon Hall of Famer Dan Balmer chose to elevate a local label, PJCE Records—an offshoot of Portland Jazz Composers Ensemble doing interesting things. For instance, to go with Balmer’s release show PJCE commissioned five composers to expand Balmer’s tunes with new arrangements. Read Ben Salmon’s profile of the artist and the event.


• It was ELECTION NIGHT throughout much of the country, and let's hear that SAD TROMBONE for Republicans, because Democrats and abortion rights won big time. In Ohio, the measure that would enshrine abortion rights into the state's constitution was soundly approved by voters, Democrat Andy Beshear of deep-red Kentucky won the governor's seat, and in Virginia, Republican anti-abortion Governor Glenn Youngkin had his ass handed to him by angry voters.

• Former first daughter Ivanka Trump is taking the stand today in daddy's New York fraud trial—and as a witness, not a co-defendant. She was with the Trump Organization until 2017 when she began working at the White House, with New York Attorney General Letitia James noting that she is "inextricably tied to the Trump Organization."

• The House has voted (and by a wide margin) to censure Democratic Rep. Rashida Tlaib for voicing her support of Palestine and denounce the Israeli government's genocidal attack on Gaza, saying "My grandmother like all Palestinians just wants to live her life with freedom and human dignity we all deserve." HOW DARE SHE??

• Any takers?

• Not that anyone cares, but the third GOP debate is tonight, and... yep, nobody cares.

• Today in "OH HELL NO HE DID NOT": "Timbaland apologizes for suggesting Justin Timberlake should've 'put a muzzle' on Britney Spears."

• Welcome back to 2005, because Grey's Anatomy's "Doctor McDreamy" Patrick Dempsey has been selected as People Magazine's "Sexiest Man Alive." (Better wake your grandma!)

• And finally... how my Good Morning, News deadline awakens me: