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GOOD MORNING, PORTLAND! Get ready for a gloriously sunny stretch of days starting today with the high reaching 83 degrees, and then scootin' up to 90 tomorrow! And then? 532 degrees by Sunday!! (Okay, that's not true... but one day it will be. 💀) And on that dark note, let's read some NEWS.


• Before we start, I just wanna say "HELLO!" to a bunch of new Mercury readers who have decided to jump into our Twitter feed after learning that we've endorsed Mike Schmidt in the upcoming Multnomah County District Attorney election instead of his (former Republican) competitor Nathan Vasquez, who's also supported by the city's millionaires and conservative class. But here's what most of Vasquez's supporters wanted us to know:

Welcome to the Mercury, you guys! Reminder that election day is May 21.

• After passing a draconian anti-homeless ordinance that criminalized poverty, but could've gotten the city in legal trouble, Portland's city council unanimously passed Mayor Wheeler's new scaled down version. This proposal would still prohibit using propane heaters, making a fire, blocking pathways to businesses and private property, among other things, but will allow public camping if the city cannot provide them shelter (which they often can't). Violators would be fined $100 and could spend a week in jail. Still not great, but of course the increasingly cruel Commissioner Rene Gonzalez threw a hissy-fit about it, accusing homeless people of being a group of being criminals who commit "relentless violence," and create "unsanitary conditions." But he voted for the revised proposal anyway, probably thinking that a somewhat evil plan is better than no evil plan at all. (This is why he was chosen as the Mercury's top Villain of 2023, and it appears as if he's gunning for 2024 as well!) In any case, our Courtney Vaughn has all the details. 

• OH! And speaking of Gonzalez' cruel policies, Friends of Portland Street Response will be gathering outside of City Hall today at 1 pm before marching to the council meeting where the PSR budget will be discussed. As you may remember, Gonzalez has consistently hobbled the popular and successful program, and attempted to kill it forever by reducing its budget by $3 million. While Mayor Wheeler stepped in and offered to keep the program at its current staffing level in his new budget, it's—and this is important—still not fully funded and running 24 hours per day, as was voted on and approved by council in 2022. Make your voice heard.

• A big chunk of industrial Northwest Portland in the Montgomery Park area (which has been largely ignored by the city for decades) is set to get a hot, sexy makeover complete with new AFFORDABLE housing, green space, street redesigns—AND an extension of the streetcar to connect the new neighborhood to the rest of downtown and beyond. Our Taylor Griggs has more.

• By a very narrow margin, last night the Portland Public School board voted to allow the JROTC program—kind of a club that teaches kids how to get themselves killed in war—to be in area high schools as an option. There were a lot of people protesting this move, as many consider the JROTC as a way to lure kids with few options into the military.

• Governor Tina Kotek has received a slap on the wrist from the Oregon Supreme Court who has overturned her decision to send a woman who had completed her jail time back to prison, revoking a commutation given to her by former Gov. Kate Brown. The woman had been in jail 2.5 years on a charge of mail fraud, but released early by Brown. And even though the state sent the woman a notice that she had served her time, Kotek sent her back to prison anyway, leading the state Supreme Court to say "NOPE!" and ordering her release.


• The grotesque Georgia Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene was dealt a stunning and quick defeat by Congress who nonchalantly brushed away her attempt to unseat House Speaker Mike Johnson, who she (somewhat correctly) labels as "weak and pathetic." And though her attempt was shut down by a whopping vote of 359-43 (OUCH!), Johnson's job isn't as safe as he'd like. (People just really, really hate Marjorie Taylor Greene.)

• Perhaps finally waking up and smelling the coffee (of potential lost voters), President Biden has warned Israel that the US could cut off the delivery of 3,500 bombs to the country if they continue their assault on the city of Rafah in Gaza. Israel is reportedly FAH-URIOUS because of Biden's decision, apparently forgetting they've already murdered 34,000 Palestinians.

• Adult film actress Stormy Daniels is being grilled today by Trump lawyers in the former president's New York hush money criminal case, who are trying to cast her as a liar after she testified (in somewhat lurid detail) about the barely consensual sex they shared in 2006, which Trump tried to keep quiet. (Expect a LOT of misogyny today.)

• Well, this sounds fucking depressing:

• Gross headline of the day (so far): "Barron Trump selected to be a Florida delegate at Republican National Convention."

• And finally... me vs. Portland conservatives.