If you’re reading this, you probably know the value of the Mercury’s news reporting, arts and culture coverage, event calendar, and the bevy of events we host throughout the year. The work we do helps our city shine, but we can’t do it without your support. If you believe Portland benefits from smart, local journalism and arts coverage, please consider making a small monthly contribution, because without you, there is no us. Thanks for your support!

GOOD MORNING, PORTLAND! đź‘‹

In case you missed it, the Mercury's ELECTION ISSUE (jam-packed with all your November 5 endorsements) went live yesterday online, and by this weekend will be in more than 500 locations around the city! And don't worry—not only does it contain the only 100 percent accurate endorsements in town, and our handy-dandy voter cheat sheet, it also heralds the (welcome?) return of the Mercury's most polarizing columnist, FRANK CASSANO. So may god have mercy on our souls... and this morning's NEWS!

IN LOCAL NEWS:

• Today in impotent political theatrics: The three most politically impotent members of City Council—Rene Gonzalez, Mingus Mapps, and Dan Ryan—are asking the city attorney to compose an ordinance that would dissolve Portland's homelessness agreement we have with Multnomah County. Oh, but here's the best part: When asked about the plan that would replace the current deal we have the county should the break-up go forward, Gonzalez COULD NOT PRODUCE A PLAN. (But like Trump, maybe he has a "concept of a plan"?) Even more hilarious, even if these three bumbling stooges were successful in ending our relationship with the county, it wouldn't go into effect until the new council arrives in January, who will almost certainly overturn it. Just like when they tried to torpedo charter reform, this is just more of Gonzalez, Mapps, and Ryan's embarrassing (and impotent!) theatrics. Your ballot is arriving soon—don't rank any of them.

• Even more tough news for mayoral candidate (and Wikipedia wiper) Rene Gonzalez: According to a poll commissioned by the Oregonian, Gonzalez is getting his bottom spanked by dark horse candidate Keith Wilson in the Portland race for mayor. Now it should be mentioned that this poll only sampled a mere 300 people—which is fucking ridiculous, but I guess that's all the Oregonian can afford or perhaps that's all they need in order to write these types of bullshit "poll" stories. And as we know, polls are (at best!) just a snapshot of one moment in time, and should never be taken the slightest bit seriously. However, in this case, and to paraphrase Lily Allen: "At first, when I see Gonzalez cry, it makes me smile." Want to make him cry more? Don't rank Rene. 

• Need even more reasons to not rank Rene? Check out my exhaustive time line of all the scandals, goof-ups, and power plays committed by Rene Gonzalez (that we know of) during his tenure in the public eye. (There's some jaw-dropping stuff in there, folks!)

• Since the ill-conceived and conservative-driven overturning of Measure 110, the state has encouraged counties to institute deflection programs to get addicted folks the help they need instead of automatically pushing them into the overburdened criminal justice system. How's that working out? About how you'd expect: While some counties—like Multnomah and Lane—have planned robust deflection programs, while others—as in the prosecution happy Douglas County—are choosing to return to the bad ol' days of the war on drugs, which never really worked out for anyone. Check out this thoughtful report from OPB.

• The New York Times took a break from shitting on Portland to write a roundup of "the best restaurants" in our city, which included such banger establishments as Akadi, Coquine, Han Oak, Kann, and more. Thanks, I guess... but just a reminder that no one asked you.

• Congrats to former Oregon Duck and women's basketball superstar Sabrina Ionescu who hit the SAH-WEEET tie-breaking three-pointer at the buzzer for the New York Liberty to beat the Minnesota Lynx 80-77. That win gives the Liberty a 2-1 lead in the WNBA finals.

IN NATIONAL/WORLD NEWS:

• Israel is reportedly testing the DNA of a slain militant they believe could be the leader of Hamas, Yahya Sinwar. The body was one of three found after an Israeli attack on Gaza, on the same day an aerial attack on a school that held displaced Palestinians killed at least 15 people, including five kids.

• Kamala Harris appeared for a contentious Fox News interview (more accurately, "argument") yesterday with (don't call him a journalist) Bret Baier, where the two bickered over immigration, gender-affirming surgeries, Trump's plan to incarcerate his political enemies, and Biden's mental acuity—though Biden wasn't the one who recently spent 30 minutes in a town hall silently bopping to Ave Maria.

• Another round of student loan forgiveness was announced by the Biden administration today, bringing the total amount of forgiven debt since the president took office to a whopping $175 billion for nearly 5 million people. (Maybe that's why Trump was so silent as he bopped to Ave Maria.)

• An independent panel has ruled that the Secret Service made “numerous mistakes” as well as “specific failures and breakdowns” during the attempted assassination of Donald Trump during a July outdoor rally in Butler, Pennsylvania. What's more, the scathing review noted that another potentially catastrophic security lapse could occur unless the Secret Service undergoes “fundamental reform.”

• Former singer for boy band One Direction, Liam Payne, died yesterday after a fall from a three-floor hotel balcony in Buenos Aires. Police say the hotel called to report “a guest who is overwhelmed with drugs and alcohol. ... He’s destroying the entire room and, well, we need you to send someone, please.” Payne's death is still being investigated; he was 31.

• And finally... Trump really gives "babygirl energy," and here's the proof.

@hellonijntje DISCLAIMER: i am NOT a Trump supporter. obviously this video is in no way supporting him, if anything i am criticising how informal and absurd his way of speaking is in official debates. PLS do your research before voting 💙  it’s like a long episode of the Office  outfit from @Lewkin ♬ original sound - RamdomCall