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GOOD MORNING, PORTLAND! Have you been enjoying these mild days and temperatures? Well SURPRISE, MOTHERLOVERS! The thermometer is swooping back up to the low 90s for both Monday and Tuesday, before dropping back down to a much more reasonable 80 degrees on Wednesday. And while I loathe to be the bearer of bad news, wildfire smoke is reportedly blowing back into the area to join us with this high heat. LOOK. Stop looking at me like that. I just write down what the meteorologists tell me, okay? And now, allow me to also write down some NEWS.
IN LOCAL NEWS:
In a tragic and baffling story, police are investigating a mass shooting in a rural area of Forest Grove, Oregon (in unincorporated Washington County), in which five people were found dead along with many domesticated animals. The suspected shooter, 36-year-old Benjamin Charles Parker, was later found dead in his vehicle in Enunclaw, Washington, and authorities think he died by suicide. The bodies in Forest Grove were discovered by firefighters who had been alerted to a burning car on the property, and then called police. There are a lot of confusing aspects to this case, and as Washington County Sheriff Caprice Massey said, “In my 22 years here, I have not been a part of or witnessed a scene quite this complex involving this type of an investigation.” More details to come.
Is it time to say “WE TOLD YOU SO” yet? Remember how Tom Dundon and his greedy band of rich pals insisted they were on a very strict deadline for the city to nail down a deal that would net them a whopping $600 million to refurbish the Moda Center? And how if city officials couldn’t meet that deadline, Dundon might just pack up his Blazers and move away? Welp, according to reporting from the Oregonian (who, let’s not forget, repeatedly begged and shamed City Council to take this shitty deal), public records indicate that Blazers owners have actually been the ones dragging their feet, which could mean trouble for the December deadline in which a deal must be made or the funding promised and approved by state legislators might go away. As we’ve reported time and again, the Blazers have thus far refused to reveal what exactly they’d use the funds to do, ignored the city’s repeated requests for an updated economic analysis of the Moda Center, and as the O reports, refused to work with city officials on the much talked-about term sheet, which is usually decided upon by both parties. Soooo… yeah! Things are NOT looking good for this deal. But who knows? Maybe Dundon will suddenly reverse his stance, and accept the amazing deal we’re giving him and that he most certainly does not deserve. But to all those downtown real estate developers, centrist politicians, daily newspapers, and paid Instagram flacks who INSISTED that if we didn’t cater to Dundon’s every need, we’d lose the Blazers: please do not be shocked when he tries to steal them away anyway, and the Mercury points directly at you and screams at the top of our lungs: WE. TOLD. YOU. SO. (Because we did!)
The decades-long movement to rename Oregon locations originally given derogatory and racist names is getting off to a slow start. The Dignity in Place Act, which was implemented in 2025 to consider and rename 90 Oregon spots that were originally given names that included racial slurs against Black, Indigenous, Asian, Brown, Italian people, and more, have only renamed two spots so far, and according to reporting from Underscore Native News have done so with little tribal involvement. Apparently part of the slowness comes from the fact that most of the offensive names are in areas not under state jurisdiction, and only a few of those are on state forest land.
In other racism news: A newly published history by journalist Steve Law examines the second wave of Ku Klux Klan influence and terrorism—and how it came to dominate Oregon politics in the 1920s. Peddlers of Hate is a dense and academic read, but the details are crucial to understanding the arc of the KKK and some profound similarities it shares with today’s United States. Mercury reporter Jeremiah Hayden went full listicle and picked out five takeaways for someone who knows they won’t finish this one, which we hope can also serve as inspiration for those ready to dive in.
Newsflash: Now that it’s hot, Portlanders are eager to swim in the Willamette. However, the biggest obstacle to river health and access right now is not sewage or outdated public perception, but something else: algae blooms. The blooms, which are caused by increases in the amount of cyanobacteria in water, can cause rashes, indigestion, and even neurological issues. One of the primary breeding ground for these algae blooms is the Ross Lagoon, and local river advocates are sounding the alarm. Find out more from Abe Asher who has the details in the Mercury’s Climate Issue, online and on the streets right now in more than 500 spots citywide! Snap one up, cha-cha!
The Portland Fire WNBA team has revealed their new mascot—or “baddie” as they refer to her—Rose the Glitter-Breathing Dragon. Rose made her debut during halftime of yesterday’s match against the Mystics, and is festooned in pink and black fishnets, a Fire jersey, and a crown of roses. (Hopefully she doesn’t actually spew glitter… have you ever tried to clean that shit up? It’s impossible!) Anyway, congrats and welcome to the Fire Pit, Rose!
Matt Johnson is no stranger to manchildren. Just seven months ago, the writer-director released an opus about maturity-challenged adults, Nirvanna the Band the Show the Movie. Now, Johnson returns to theaters with Tony—an Anthony Bourdain biopic that doesn’t really try to be an Anthony Bourdain biopic, which is why it might be the best Anthony Bourdain biopic we can imagine. Get ready to nerd out on shellfish in our delicious review by Dominic Sinacola.
IN NATIONAL AND WORLD NEWS:
It’s not enough that Trump is ruining our economy—he wants to take other countries down with us. After negotiations with Canada collapsed, the president is threatening to impose 50 percent tariffs on the country, specifically targeting the country’s cars, steel, and auto parts. And Canadian Prime Minister Mark Carney is not having it, firing back, “Canada will match Washington’s new tariffs dollar for dollar in order to protect Canadian workers, farmers, families, and businesses.” Meanwhile, after watching his war with Iran sink into a seemingly endless quagmire, Trump has announced he’s launching a financial war—what he calls “an economic D-Day” on the country as well. While America has imposed sanctions on Iran for years (and frankly, they’ve become mostly used to it), Trump is promising that these latest efforts will be “unprecedented,” and will force the country’s leaders to abandon their nuclear program and reopen the Strait of Hormuz. (Maybe Trump’s trying to wreck these economies so ours won’t look so bad in comparison?)
An out-of-control wildfire is threatening the city of Reno, Nevada, destroying homes in the northwestern part of the city and forcing roughly 90,000 of its citizens to evacuate. The fire covers 23 square miles, is reportedly fast-moving, and has been zero percent contained.
Today in HA-HA-HA: The Washington Post–who has seen its opinion section decimated since being purchased by Amazon’s Jeff Bezos—has been forced to rehire one of their former opinion writers who was fired after writing social media posts about slain right-wing transphobe Charlie Kirk. A private arbiter has ordered the newspaper to rehire Black opinion writer Karen Attiah, as well as provide her with back pay, saying the Post violated its labor agreement by not providing a “good and sufficient cause” for the firing. In the social media post that got her fired, Attiah wrote on the day following Kirk’s killing that her “refusal to tear my clothes and smear ashes on my face in performative mourning for a white man that espoused violence is … not the same as violence.” Sounds like something an opinion writer has every right to say, and without retribution.
Listen up, stoners:
And finally… if this isn’t the perfect metaphor for capitalism, I don’t know what is. Have a great work week, I guess!
