1) It’s not easy being a horse. 2) It’s especially not easy being a horse with an uncomfortable rectal itch. Like, what are they supposed to do? Use their hooves? 3) It’s especially not easy being a horse with an uncomfortable rectal itch, and a master with a video camera who just happens to be a cackling hillbilly jerk. 4) Granted, it’s not easy being a tree, either.
Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.) More by Wm. Steven Humphrey
QI FUN FACT
That is a female horse, and she is masturbating.
The tree is a horsey dildo? Maybe she needs a horse sized dose of Vagisil.
You know you’re on Blogtown when a euphemism for “genital masturbation” is “rectal itching.”
Well, you can’t really blame blogtown, since the original video hillbilly claimed the horse’s butt itched. But it’s actually been scientifically observed that horses masturbate against trees, and unless you just happen to be privy to this “special” information, I can see how it might be mistaken for butt-itching.
I was thinking it was really cute until I read Scrummy’s comment. I hope he is joking! I prefer it as an itchy butt.
Hmmm…someone’s been googling “painful rectal itch.” Now we know why WSH has been spending less time sitting in his office and more time hanging out in the the hall in his underpants.