Update 5:23pm: Good news! Local activist Reverend Chuck Currie reports that he called Portland Rescue Mission this afternoon and suggested they meet with LGBT advocacy group Basic Rights Oregon to understand “why this might be hurtful the gay and lesbian community.” The Rescue Mission agreed—so maybe they’re one big step closer to accepting the gay coats. /update
I just got an upsetting, disappointing call from queer performer Jeffrey Darling, a man whom many Portlanders might know better as his sexxxy-lady alter-ego, Fannie Mae.
In short, Darling, while planning his fourth annual Queer Quistmas holiday bash, was told this morning by the Portland Rescue Mission that they weren’t interested in sponsoring a coat-and-sweater drive at the event. Because it’s a “queer” event, he was told in a voice mail message. The mission is a “faith-based organization and there was some concern with how it might come across to some of our donors.”
Darling is pissed. And he couldn’t keep quiet, he says, calling the mission’s decision “total bigotry.” Darling, you might remember, went public this spring about a gay-bashing incident—he was beaten outside a bar—and helped put a spotlight on why the queer community sometimes feels uncomfortable reporting those attacks.
“It was a huge slap in the face,” he says. “I know a lot of really amazing people who could have helped to donate to them. … Do not donate to the Portland Rescue Mission if you are queer. This is a queer city. Even the straight people are queer, because we’re all weird. … I know it’s a Christian organization, but haven’t we gotten past that? Wash them if you think they’re ‘dirty.'”
Brian Merrell, the fellow at the Portland Rescue Mission who helps coordinate donation drives, left the message. He seemed disquieted when I called for a response. He didn’t deny Darling’s account, promising to call me back and saying “I have no comment at this point.”
Darling expects to formally announce his event soon. It’s planned for December 20 at Mississippi Studios, and in partnership with the Oregon Food Bank, no one will be allowed in unless they bring a canned good or two or five to donate. Darling says he’s also raising money and awareness about ovarian cancer—his sister is grappling with it and her medical bills are well into six figures. In the meantime, he’s looking for a new partner for the coat drive.
“I have 15 coats and sweaters i can donate, and I know I’m not alone,” he says. “There are gay homeless people and they need a safe place, too. They need to wake the fuck up and get into 2010.”
After the jump: a transcription of the voice mail message the Portland Rescue Mission sent to Darling. “Ums and all,” he says. Read it for yourself. How lousy. It also makes me think of Street Roots’ recent flap with Catholic Charities.
“Hi Jeffrey. This is Brian Merrell with Portland Mission Rescue Mission. We spoke yesterday, um, about, um, connecting for the, um…queer Christmas event, um, and I just wanted to get back to you and, um, let you know that um, I have ran that up the ladder here and unfortunately, I think we are going to need to respectively decline, um. Let me preface this by saying that we don’t, do not, discriminate services to anyone, either outreach services or recovery services, meals or anything. But we are a faith-based organization and there was some concern with how it might come across to some of our donors. That, so, um, with that we are going to have to respectively decline, although I greatly appreciate what you want to do for us.”
Not just Christian but Evangelical Christian…they believe in everlasting punishment in hell for “the lost,” so why would they want coats from people who are going to burn in torment for trillions, quadrillions, quintillions of years? “…haven’t we gotten past that?” No. They haven’t.
You aren’t prefacing it, if you say it after the fact.
Christians can be so gay sometimes
Oh, for the love of…IT’S RESPECTFULLY.
I don’t think it is so odd, what is the rescue mission going to do with a bunch of gay goats? I think that it may not even be legal for them to have 15 goats at their location and it could take months of prayer to convert them to regular goats, and even longer to convince them to switch over to missionary position from the normal “goat style”…wait wait I’m being told that these are gay “coats”, well now that is ridiculous.
I don’t donate to faith-based organizations because of this sort of bullshit. Fuck these guys, the bell ringing Salvation Army, and all the rest of them. If they don’t want FABULOUS coats, there’s other charities that do.
Dude. Outside In. Queerer than the queerest queer in Queertown.
I remember rumblings about PRM refusing services based on orientation yonks ago – maybe 10 or 15 years? – and transferred my donations from them to Outside In because of it.
If they’re so desperate to avoid scaring their bigoted donors, fine. Just makes it that much more obvious to the rest of us that our donations are needed elsewhere.
If PRM doesn’t want to be associated with sexuality, maybe they should consider changing their logo from that dead ringer for a cock and balls.
Hm. This morning I put 9 winter coats in the back of the car, thinking I’d drop them at PRM. Now I think I’d prefer to donate to the Queer Quistmas.
Anyone have contact info for Jeffrey Darling other than the facebook page?
Thanks.
It just doesn’t make sense for them biologically, because they continue to have need for items and those gay coats can’t multiply.
Very sad, and ridiculous, really.
Because of their similar anti-gay stance (though most people are unaware of it), unfortunately, I am unable to support in any way The Salvation Army.
Apparently, those worthy of dignity, respect, charity and love doesn’t include gay people.
The Portland Rescue Mission is absolutely correct to refuse Jeffrey Darling’s coats and sweaters. Outerwear is a known carrier of homosexuality. Don’t members of Portland’s homeless community have enough problems without having to worry about catching THE GAY? Darling’s offer may seem like charity, but obviously he’s just promoting the Radical Homosexual Agenda by trying to turn our hobos into homos! Kudos to the PRM for foiling his nefarious plot, and without any involvement from the FBI even. Kudos.
Sounds like they asked PRM to sponsor the event, not whether or not they wanted coats. Why not just collect the coats and sweaters at your event and then drop them at PRM later?
Could it be because this is really about you, and not the coats?
Nope, Blabby. Thanks for asking. Did you ask because this is really about you, and not PRM’s attitude problem?
As a minister in the United Church of Christ, I apologize for the bigoted behavior of some Christians. The church universal must repent for the discrimination and hatred fostered against gays and lesbians. Back in 1985 the General Synod of the United Church of Christ declared our denomination to be Open and Affirming of gays and lesbians. Twenty years later – in 2005 – we became the first mainline Christian church to call for full marriage equality. And all the way back in 1972 we ordained the first openly gay man to ministry. All of this is to say, the Holy Spirit is at work moving the church. The United Church of Christ has not been alone in this journey as more denominations have opened their hearts and doors. All of us must keep pushing the envelope in respectful ways that deepen relationships and break down barriers. Still, this story saddens me. I invite people to pray for the people of the Portland Rescue Missions that their hearts be softened by God, for those they serve in the name of Christ who would be cold and hungry without their efforts, and for all of us as well. None of us are completely free from bigotry and hate.
– Rev. Chuck Currie
http://www.chuckcurrie.com
I work in non-profit development, so on one hand I sympathize with the Portland Rescue Mission on this one. They no doubt have two or three very generous donors who are also virulent homophobes, and who they know would yank their sizable donations if they found that PRM was partnering with a “queer” organization. Every non-profit goes through this to one extent or another: what do you do about things that are worthwhile but that might alienate your big donors. Particularly as we approach the end of the year, which is when a lot of big gifts come in before the tax deadline. So, folks, you don’t have to agree with them, but I hope you’ll appreciate the difficult position they’re in. They do good work, and if they lose $150,000 or whatever because a couple of their donors are homophobes, then that hurts their organization, big time.
That said, they didn’t go about doing this in a very savvy way, at all. They definitely could have arranged to have the coats donated without drawing a lot of attention to it. If Brian Merrell was better versed in this kind of thing, he might have avoided this blowing it up as it has. This makes them look lots worse than it needed to.
Transition Projects would be happy to take your coats and blankets. They have donation barrels at most Windermere Realtor locations in the PDX area – and a few other places as well.
http://www.tprojects.org/content.cfm/ABOUT…
“I asked a Christian organization to sponsor something called Queer Quistmas and was shocked… SHOCKED I tellsya… when they declined. So I transcribed some well-meaning guy’s phone message and sent it to the Mercury with a healthy dose of my own self-righteous whining so that everyone could see how deeply I have been wronged. I feel much better, thank you. And oh, have you heard about my event?!”
Dave J, I hear ya. But hard choices are what life is about, and in those times you’re supposed to follow your heart and your sense of morality. To that end, what PRM is saying is not that they’re afraid of bigoted donors not ponying up, they’re saying that their interest in retaining donors is more important than admitting publicly that gay coats don’t carry malaria–even if gay people ARE immoral.
I actually think the real reason is they fear the coats would be WAY too fashion-forward for homeless people.
Jeffrey Darling is well-known to start a ruckus because it suits him professionally and socially. The Portland Rescue Mission has done this before and its not new news. Instead he often choose the political hot buttons to press during the times when his missing of the old Sissyboy ‘fame’ comes back around.
Blabby’s got a point. What does he mean by “sponsor” the event? That’s never explained.
Called Portland Rescue Mission to tell them they’re not getting my gay coats. Receptionist said she hadn’t heard anything about it. Now she has.
He ran up the ladder to then have some people decline “It”. The Ladder. If there´s a God, he Loves everyone, and Mr. Brian Merrell is going to Hell, while Jeffrey Darling and his Alter Ego to Heaven.
Maaaan, this is really fucked up. – I haven´t read any of the above comments so am not following the thread, sorry –
– Oh, I did read some part. Dear Dave J, would you rather have your organization lose 150,000 Dollars or go to hell? –
“…sponsoring a coat-and-sweater drive at the event.”
It doesn’t sound like they are being asked to sponsor the event by way of promotion or whatever. Just drop a barrel and collect some outerwear.
Street Roots should have gone ahead and allowed a version without Planned Parenthood and then slapped a sticker on the back that gives Planned Parenthood info. Catholic Charities then did not pay for that portion and no one else has to try to scrape together 40,000 smackers.
Portland Rescue Mission is staying true to what they believe as an organization. Why would anyone expect them to SPONSOR an event that doesn’t line up with their beliefs? No one would expect a pro-choice group to sponsor a pro-life event, for example. It seems like COMMON SENSE to me that Darling should have asked an organization like Outside In to sponsor his event.
I think people are getting hung up on the word “sponsor”.
Typically, when an organization “sponsors” an event, they are putting some kind of money or promotion into it, even if they hope to make that back in proceeds.
But aside from the appearance of the word “sponsor” in this article, the circumstances described don’t necessarily warrant it… it seems more likely that Darling was seeking to list PRM as a _beneficiary_ of a coat drive. If he was asking for active promotion or funding from PRM, I missed it.
Hello! What was a homosexual organization doing asking a Christian organization to be a part of their event?? Hey, let’s see if the skinheads would be interested in hosting a Holocaust Memorial while you’re at it. Next time do some research, Jeffrey Darling. Unless of course, you did this on purpose because you knew what their response would be and you wanted the publicity.
And it sounds like the people at the rescue mission were very pleasant about it but you are dragging them through the mud anyway. So, you are saying that the mission is bigoted but aren’t you just as bigoted for not accepting their Christian philosophy?
Donate your coats and sweaters to the people that need it and stop wasting time on trashing an organization that helps a lot of needy people out there.
You’re right, Blabby!
God Damn Jeffrey Darling for trying to call attention to an event that will help raise food donations for the Food Bank, and that will help raise money for ovarian cancer research/treatment/awareness!
He is so damn self-important and myopic!
EVERYONE PAY ATTENTION TO BLABBY INSTEAD!
wow! thanks gang at the MERCURY for reporting this sad incident…I had earlier tonight wrote checks for my bills
and various other items such as a “contribution” to the
Portland Rescue Mission in response to a leaflet I received
…lucky for me, I hadn’t as yet dropped these letters into
mail box…I simply took the letter addressed to Portland
Rescue Mission with nice check inside and tore it in half
tossed in the trash can, where these outdated notions
belong as well… had I not read your blog tonight and had
mailed out the mail first thing in the morning, I’d felt
awful later to find out the TRUTH about these characters
at Portland Rescue Mission….thanks for reporting this!
In BrandonS’s rotten analogy, follow the parallels:
Homosexual organization == Skinheads
Portland Rescue Mission = Holocaust Memorial
Further, BrandonS makes the completely bizarre and unfounded accusation that Jeffrey Darling is “just as bigoted for not accepting their Christian philosophy?”.
Whaaaaaht?
Seems to me that Darling was totally accepting, as he invited them to participate in some way and he offered to get them coats for the homeless.
It wasn’t Darling who backed out of this deal.
Stay classy there, BrandonS.
Meanwhile, can we have genuine opposition, please? Maybe someone with challenging ideas who can formulate an argument without resorting to a blatantly offensive (yet somehow revealing) false analogy?
Thanks.
Why don’t we take a minute and look at this from the standpoint of the actual homeless who benefit from the generosity of Portland Rescue Mission? All publicity, politicking, and moral decision-making aside, practically speaking, what’s worse?
(A) A few homeless do not receive coats this winter because PRM decides not to “sponsor” a particular event. -OR-
(B) Many homeless go without coats and other services because a few (regrettably homophobic) charitable donors pull their funding from PRM.
I understand Jeffrey Darling’s beef with PRM’s initial response – and it sounds like it could have been (be?) handled better. But let’s cut the PRM some slack here with this tough decision. The non-profit’s association with a particular event could affect whether or not they receive the funds (let alone some coats) needed to help the countless homeless in this city. Should we pull all support from the PLM (and thereby starve an organization that feeds the homeless) because of our own moral indignation? If, in truth, we (queers and non-queers alike) want to help the homeless, then I’d think we’d find a more amicable way to resolve this dilemma. Closing closets and checkbooks helps no one.
@Bob R.
Brandon S. said:
“Hey, let’s see if the skinheads would be interested in hosting a Holocaust Memorial while you’re at it.”
The skinheads are being asked, so in this analogy, PRM actually parallels with the skinheads.
And Brandon’s comment that Darling isn’t accepting PRM’s Christian philosophy is dead on. Open-mindedness works both ways. We aren’t all going to agree, but PRM has a right to hold true to what they believe as an organization, just as Darling has a right to hold true to his beliefs.
“And Brandon’s comment that Darling isn’t accepting PRM’s Christian philosophy is dead on.”
You’ve got to be kidding.
Darling invited PRM to participate in some way. They refused.
How does that make Darling intolerant?
If Darling were intolerant, he wouldn’t have bothered to try and include them in a charity benefit in the first place. Sheesh.
Here’s an overly-summarized real-life scenario that happened to someone I know: A plumbing company was hired for emergency repairs by a gay couple. The plumbing truck arrived and had a “Jesus fish” on it. But the couple just needed to have the work done, and didn’t ask about religion. Halfway through the repairs, the plumbing employee (via photos, books, intuition?) figured out that the couple was gay (one partner was not home) and expressed his discomfort about working in a “gay” home and left in a hurry. Calls were maid to the main office, and the office refused to send anyone else out.
By your logic, the gay couple was “intolerant” because they attempted to hire a Christian plumbing company. They should have been more “tolerant” of the plumbing company’s views by not attempting to hire them in the first place. Riiiiiiiiiiiiight.
(And for those still bothering to follow along, here’s another wrinkle: Many gay people are Christians, too. Even ministers, and they minister to the homeless. Leaping to the conclusion that a gay person shouldn’t bother to attempt to work with a Christian group *is* intolerant. Thanks for playing.)
First and foremost, PRM handled this very poorly. They did not communicate well with Darling, seemed to try and quickly extinguish a difficult situation for them rather than try and find a working solution.
That being said, in no way were PRM’s actions bigoted or improper. They have stated they would be more than happy to except the donations, but declined the offer to partner with (or sponsor) the event. PRM is a conservative, traditional christian organizations, and Queer Christmas is very much a different spin on christianity’s most sacred holiday. It is simply inconsistent with their marketing and communication, and would likely alienate many of their donors.
They made a choice that was consistent with their vision and identity, and in no way passed judgement on the event, homosexuals, or Darling. This feels completely overblown to me. These are people trying to do good, and are doing better than most in our city. Can we at least show them some benefit of the doubt?
@Bob R.
Your plumbing analogy doesn’t parallel this situation at all. PRM is not refusing service to anyone based on their values. They simply don’t want to sponsor an event that doesn’t line up with their beliefs.
When I say Darling is intolerant, obviously I’m not talking about him ASKING PRM to sponsor/partner with him. I’m talking about Darling’s RESPONSE to their not wanting to sponsor. PRM has the right to turn down his offer, and he is being extremely intolerant of their decision.
@restoresanity
Well said! PRM made the best choice for their organization and the people they serve.
“When I say Darling is intolerant, obviously I’m not talking about him ASKING PRM to sponsor/partner with him. I’m talking about Darling’s RESPONSE to their not wanting to sponsor. PRM has the right to turn down his offer, and he is being extremely intolerant of their decision.”
Nonsense. Darling’s response may have been rather public and clumsy and not what you’d prefer, but it’s not “intolerant”.
An “intolerant” Darling would never have approached PRM int he first place, and an “intolerant” Darling would have denounced PRM afterward, rather than merely revealing their voicemail and expressing disappointment.
Your desire (and Brandon’s desire) to create a false-equivalency doesn’t change the reality.
A charitable deal was offered to PRM. They refused (in a polite but bigotry-acknowledging manner). Darling revealed this to the world. Revelation of actual events is not intolerance.
So I notice a few patterns in the posts and that this really did not have to be such a big mess.
For starters, what I see is: “they weren’t interested in sponsoring a coat-and-sweater drive at the event”
what I interpret is: they weren’t interested in sending someone to setup a table in the space and represent PRM while collecting donations in a queer space event.
and my takeaway is: PRM is just stupid. Show up, smile, say thank you (faggot, mentally if necessary), and don’t blab about where the fabulous new donations came from. The bigoted big donors keep funding a charitable cause, the queer community gets to do something good for everybody, its a win-win situation. Especially compared to the current one.
Bob R., you’re right. PRM should have put aside their own beliefs as an organization and done what was necessary to make Darling and you happy. All religious people should open their minds by completely agreeing with you. I was trying to add a new perspective to this article (although, clearly it was written in a very objective, unbiased way to begin with). But thanks for reminding me that tolerance and understanding only work one way. I apologize for sharing my nonsensical opinion.
Oh God, I have only read a few of the paragraphs since I posted mine, the very illustrative one. Hypocrites and dressed up over all good life haters, does God the Almighty hates Gays?
Do your communities have still to nurture the puerile needs of the adults amongst you?
Gezzz, get a hobby gay haters and overall cowards. I suggest miniature car and airplane modeling.
Haha Leaky, I don’t hate anyone but what a great argument.
I, like some others in this thread, am saying that people have the right to believe and support whatever they want to. Gay people have the right to host all the “Queer Quistmases” they want, and Christians have the right to choose whether or not they want to participate in said event. Freedom – it applies to all of us.
Yes, but my argument in this particular case, it´s based on the nature of the organization. If it´s a Christian one, it´s absurd for PRM to have turned down Jeffrey Darling´s propose just because he´s a Homosexual. A homosexual Created by God. And what PRM did was not “Choosing”, they where Excluding.
Your doing an UnGodly thing, besides being childlike. Either way. Teach your communities. Your almost obliged to do that darn thing. Or change your premises to a Non Religion Community. If not your still in fault.
But you got a point in all seriousness. People definitively cannot like Gay people, like I said in a previous post. But you have to either learn to live with it (like an adult would) , simply get annoyed at the Gay Coat Bash, or simply not go at it. Which sucks for the Gay Hater but hey, they can do something about it. They can grow up.
People in overall have to let Gay Communities worldwide live their own lives in their own terms. It´s their own business. Gay marriages were happily supported by the whole Spanish people frikin years ago. Big Frikin Party which everyone attended that lasted days. Everybody was happy! How come in America, other people get to decide if Gays are to be married or not, it´s absurd! That´s where Gay Haters come in. Or if you please place Homophobic when I say that word. Maybe the causing problems communities can do something about their own education about Homosexuality, gayness, and queerness. I don´t have that problem in my community, or in my circle of friends. And am not Gay. Gay people should have their rights to decide their own personal fates, just like everyone of us. Or by most of us, who aren´t bounded by irrational moral beliefs, or “discomforts”.
If your homophobic, you would just have an irrational fear of gays. You wouldn´t go out of your ways to make their life’s harder. It´s all part of the same problem.
And most definitively in this case this shouldn´t have happened, cuz the organization is a Christian one. It´s supposed to be about loving everybody, not about being hypocrites and excluding people with lame excuses for whatever their case was.
Let´s see when Homosexuals are gonna start sitting in front of the bus and will not go to the back anymore.
All of this problems have obvious solutions.
Yes Tycks, Freedom applies to all, even to Homosexuals. Gay Fear or however you want to call it belongs in support groups and in the shrinks couch. Not the other way around.
I hope you and your community all meditate about this and go forward, the right way. Do the right thing man.
And I wasn´t being sarcastic with my illustrative point, taken in account you call yourself, a Christian. And I don´t find it funny either.
I could go on, but it´s a long post already.
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Portland is currently in 9th place out of 100. If we make the top six by New Year’s, our community will get $100,000 to help local families fight hunger. I think we can all support that. Tell your friends!
As a former employee of Portland Rescue Mission I witnessed on a consistent basis how they took gay men in their rehab and tried to convince them that homosexuality was a sin and was a result of their being molested or something else which “changed” them… They also consistently had meetings on how to deal with transgender guests and whether they should “permit” those who identify themselves as a member of the opposite from which they were born. They never decided to do so because it was the “right” thing to do, but rather because of legal issues.