Anonymous Apr 20, 2015 at 2:11 pm

Unless Maybe You're Completely Bald on Top

Anonymous
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Comments

1
Facial hair troll - Level 9.

Not cool. Asking a dude to shave his beard is exactly like asking a woman to shave her legs or armpits.
RickStevens on April 20, 2015 at 2:55 PM Report this
2
During our meetings, the members of my MRA organization like to stroke each other's beards, because they're so very manly.

Oh wait, did I say "meetings"? I meant "circle jerks."
albert on April 20, 2015 at 3:22 PM Report this
3
I look like a naked mole rat without my beard. Maybe you should shave my balls for me.
totaldevotion on April 20, 2015 at 3:36 PM Report this
4
Oh boy, this is going to turn into a bunch of beta males and bearded women slinging the term MRA around.

In general, it's best not to tell men or women what to do in regards to how they look. Next topic please.
assisse on April 20, 2015 at 3:47 PM Report this
5
Dear Portland Women,

Stop dressing like you just came into town from a refugee camp.
King Ralph on April 20, 2015 at 3:53 PM Report this
6
Also, it's 84F out. Take off the winter scarf. You look dumb.
assisse on April 20, 2015 at 3:55 PM Report this
7
...I feel a disturbance in the force... something dark and terrifying in the near future... muttonchops....
JRRTrollkien on April 20, 2015 at 6:25 PM Report this
8
What makes you think anyone in Portland WANTS to look good?
Jimmy Carter on April 20, 2015 at 9:25 PM Report this
9
This might have been dubiously written by a bearded guy who wants to "trim" the herd down so he stands out more. Hipster women on okcupid are still raving about how they love beards.
on April 21, 2015 at 7:06 AM Report this
10
Also, use a third mirror to trim the hair on your balls and ass. Extra points for not accidentally stabbing your perineum.
Todd Mecklem on April 21, 2015 at 8:57 AM Report this
11
ugh, could you imagine how great the ugly factor would be in this town if all these trollish manbabies shaved their makeup off? trust me, you WANT the beards, you NEED the beards!!! A man without a beard is like a woman without make-up, you see all his acne scares and blotchy skin tone. Keep the beards me, don't make us like you for who you are, keep as liking you for the fantasy we all wish we could be part of.
mtngoatz on April 21, 2015 at 11:53 AM Report this
12
This was definitely written by a blonde guy.
pollo on April 21, 2015 at 11:56 AM Report this
13
and guys- remember the beard hair does NOT go in the garbage disposal.
i'mrightyourwrong on April 21, 2015 at 1:45 PM Report this
14
Don't worry, by next year we will have reach "Peak Beard" in Portland and the reactionary trendsetters will start shaving them off until being clean shaven becomes cool again...
Deezus on April 22, 2015 at 10:15 AM Report this
15
I would just like to take this opportunity to throw out the word "herpsters"
Gordogato on April 22, 2015 at 10:09 PM Report this
16
Dan Savage?! Is that you?
on April 23, 2015 at 9:44 PM Report this

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