Fuck you Portlandia! You are the easiest and my personal favorite scapegoat. This is ALL your fault. You are not funny. You never were funny. You’ve ruined our city by turning us into a fucking commercial for hipster bullshit. I’ve been here for 20 years. I have watched it change. Portland is now a soulless amusement park for the entitled and wealthy. I hate what this city is becoming and I blame YOU!
P.S. Stop expecting all my friends to be in your skits for free and to hand over their food carts and spaces so you can film. You make tons of money off your shitty show and you give none of it back. FUCK YOU!
Oh joy, now we’ll get to witness yet another one of JTR’s hissy-fits.
It’s true. Portlandia is not a funny show. I only laughed after I moved because it’s kind of funny to see people around who resemble some of the characters. Besides that. The show is boring. Here are some characters that could help with the humor.
1. Dog Owner that loves dogs more than people
2. Public Transit road rage
That’s really all I can think of…..
Damned straight. That show is awful. Fred Armisen is not funny at all, and Carrie Brownstein is a sellout. Have you seen that American Express commercial where she is all hipstered out and munches on a record album? Ugh!
But guys. According to Carrie’s interview with Willamette Weed, the show is “part of a conversation the city has had with itself for many years.”
Oh wait. That’s complete drivel. She really has mastered the art of meaningless double-speak.
Newsflash – it sucks to be an aging, under educated and under employed person in any city in the U.S. Shit is expensive, it is in every city and has been going that way for a while now, and failure to plan for it leads to distress. Portland is not alone in this reality.
Life isn’t always easy, but let’s not hide the fact that many, many of the people who are spouting the same type of shit as ia, are 30 something man-children who thought they could slide by in life just as they did in their 20s. Now they must bitch about it on the internet and find ridiculous scapegoats.
BUT – don’t fret, there will also always be those who have found success who you can call “sell outs” to make yourself feel like you have at least some sort of cred and help you give meaning to your life (when in reality such “sell outs” have more cred in their little finger than you could hope to have in 3 lifetimes).
“Cred”–hahahaha!
Hey JTR, did it ever occur to you that some of the people criticizing all of this might actually have decent jobs and lead respectable existences, yet still can see right through the hyped up BS and call it for what it is? People that, although they may be financially stable, choose to live modest lives and not try to keep up with the hipster Joneses?
I thought not.
And no, shit is NOT expensive in EVERY city by any means.
What is “all of this” and the “hype” you speak of? Portland is genuinely an attractive place for many people who are moving here for new jobs, shorter commute times (yes, even with the recent increases in traffic), a great food / bar scene, the outdoors, charming and well connected neighborhoods, the large concentration of younger people, etc. etc. It’s not just hype. That is the point you are missing when you fail to realize that Portland’s growth is for real reasons and it’s not just being driven by this false “hype” that has magically been stirred up in mass quantities by a marginally funny tv show, on a boutique network, that doesn’t even paint Portland in that positive of a light in the first place.
The problems is, people just spout shit off about Portland being ruined because they are getting older and disgruntled that they are no longer part of what is currently popular with the “kids”, and/or they can’t accept the fact that the depressed cost of living that the city saw for so many years is finally coming up to where any person with half a brain could have guessed it would go.
Finally, name a comparably sized city (to that of the greater Portland metropolitan area) on the west coast with even half of the amenities that people love about Portland that is cheaper. Sure, I guess you could look at the inland empire in CA, but that’s no comparison at all, and moving to such a place would be considered “selling out”, right? San Diego, LA, SF, Seattle and even Denver and Portland’s most often compared too city – Austin – all are higher on the rent-specific cost of living rankings. Not to mention, my original point still stands that even across the US in much less “desirable” places, the cost of living has been on the rise in recent decades driven largely by the shift of people wanting to live close-in vs. in the burbs.
JTR, you are either being disingenuous or intentionally obtuse. There’s a reason many of us (including those with adequate income) rarely step foot on Division, North Williams, Mississippi, etc. It’s because it’s all so intentionally and carefully curated to fall into Portland’s new “image.” Portlandia, NYT articles, and the rest of the hype all serve to perpetuate this image. This brings in the moneyed hordes who could care less about the middle and lower income residents who have made this city their home for years and decades. And you talk about people who want to be close to jobs and amenities–well guess what? These things are becoming the domain of the wealthy, and the middle and lower classes don’t have the access to such “privileges.” What good are restaurants, bars, bike lanes, public transit, and convenient neighborhoods if they only exist to serve the money classes? You seem to think it’s all un-/underemployed deadbeats and aging hippies who are complaining. Actually, many of the people complaining are those who have a social conscience, and not simply a vested interest in their rising property values.
I can get one of the best Falafel sandwiches I’ve ever had for $6 at a food truck in St. Johns. Fills me up and I’m a large man. If you can’t afford a fucking delicious $6 meal for lunch or dinner then you’ve missed the point of living on the fucking west coast of America. It’s one of if not the most desirable places to live! If you prefer cheap ass fast food and your selection of corporations within a square block then move to Idaho. Stop bitching about prices going up. I’m sure the people who own the business don’t mind, nor the home owners or anyone else actually INVESTED in this city.
Wm needs to stop writing these.
Man JTR/DERD, you really are a sick puppy. Your parents are rich and the only thing you ever worked hard at is trolling IA and suckling your rich moms teet.
So we’re all talking about people who are talking about someone who was talking about Portlandia like it’s important in some way?
I saw that your comment was deleted. Why was that?
loveanddeath – Back to the original topic of Portlandia somehow ruining Portland: the problem is that the whole premise of Portland having a super attractive and unique “new image” driven by Portlandia is bullshit. The foodie scene, locally made / vintage, farmers markets, artisan this and that…IS HAPPENING in every major city in the world, including ALL of those cities I list above. People know about these trends and they are widespread….it’s not just a Portland-only phenomena that was blown up by Portlandia or a few NYT travel articles, leading thousands of zombies to pick up everything and move here sight unseen.
Related to the rest of your post, if you want to take this to a “transplants are trampling on the poor” discussion and an argument that Portland has a unique income inequality problem not seen in other cities, that is a whole nother IA. BUT, it would be interesting to first know what are you doing to help income inequality in the city that the average member of the “moneyed hoardes” isn’t?
Turden – glad you made it this far. Hopefully this post has double the effect on you that my paragraphs 2 and 3 did in my previous post.
I’ve never written an IA in my life, turden.
JTR, it’s quite clear that you don’t get it and likely will never get it (unless you fall on economic hardship and/or get priced out yourself). But it’s really of no concern to you, as the free market will likely allow Portland to continue moving in the direction and take on the character you seem to love so much. Now, go eat some sushi, drink a glass of fine wine, and fall asleep in the comforting somnolence of your own complacent self-satisfaction, while out there, somewhere in the night, a hardworking, honest person is losing sleep over how they are going to find an affordable place to live after receiving their no-cause eviction.
Oh, the old “you just don’t get it”. Whats next, I know you are but what am I?
The funny thing is that you have gone away from the ridiculous original ia topic of portlandia and turned this into some grandstand on how you are so pro poor. I can guarantee that you didn’t give two shits about the topic of income inequality or renters rights 10, 15 or 20 years ago when it was black families being displaced and you and your grungy friends were able to live dirt cheap in your 90s utopia. Now, you are getting older, hate the current cultural trends and tastes of the younger crowd, many of your friends are realizing that the utopia of the 90s can’t last forever (sick portlandia reference!) and all of the sudden you are a crusader for the poor and renters? An online comment section crusader that is, which is the most effective kind!
Back to the original rant – Portlandia had nothing to do with any if the things (all national trends) that you seem to hate so much.
I’m done engaging with you and your lack of any insight into the complexity of a situation. It’s like arguing with my Republican dad at Thanksgiving. So there you go. You “win.”
This ia was about portlandia supposedly ruining portland. Even if it were about the portland rental market or income inequality, you didn’t make any relevant or intelligent points about this beyond pointing out the obvious issues and making it clear that you dislike people moving here. And then insinuated (I think) that transplants should feel the blame for portlands shitshow of a job at planning for growth….all while stereotyping them all as evil “moneyed” hoardes.
It’s kind of silly to go on and on about this, but I do think it is important to have a sane and reasonable voice on the recurrimg topic of portland somenow being dead that doesn’t go straight to the old standby scapegoats of transplants, douches and hipsters. All of which are a nationwide phenomena in big cities. Just like income inequality and the issue of housing for the poor.
P.s – I have never voted for a republican and have been a registered independent for 15 years.
Please tell us more about your political leanings JTR. We care, we really do.
The sad part about your trolling me (look at your name you psycho) is that you really do care.
A – get a job
B – maybe get a boyfriend so you can simmer down?
C – get an education so you can afford rent in this town (yes I know you are a white male and have no excuse for bitching about portland rent prices)….how else do you have enough time to sit in your mom’s trailer and troll me non stop
I will lean into your mother any day, just as I did about 9 months before she had you as a big surprise on a toilet in a plaid pantry. Is that want you mean by “leanings” you loser?
Was that the night her fat ass taught you about “prolapse” you sicko? Or did you find that on your own later in life when you met loveanddearh in the Gresham Applebee’s?
Losing your cool JTR. It’s not very becoming of you.
I’ll start looking for work after the holiday if it’s all the same to you. I’m sure not looking forward to having to work for a living, but if I ever want to be a HOMEOWNER, I’d better start cracking.
Any tips for helping me become a success like yourself?
Also, I’m a bit curious how my mom would teach me about a prolapsed anus on the night of my conception. You make even less sense when you’re angry JTR.
And I’ll let you in on a little secret… My true satisfaction will come when you reference me a month from now after The Merc has banned my account. I know, I know, I’m a small person.
But, at least I save these little mind games for the truly deserving such as yourself. Just know that you’ve only been mind-fucked because you deserve it. Just a little food for thought the next time your out enjoying a nice meal that you’ll undoubtedly make mention of in your posts. One of these days it may actually be somewhere I haven’t eaten already.
Sweet dreams little man.