FUN FACT, GUYS! Jay Leno really, really hates Japanese people. For proof here’s Jay as Detective Tony Costas in the 1989 cop comedy Collision Course (co-starring poor Pat Morita). But don’t worry! The always hilarious Everything is Terrible has edited this classic film down to a watchable three minutes—that is, if you can classify three minutes of Jay Leno spewing racist and misogynist zingers as “watchable.”

I never want to stop punching him in the face.

https://youtube.com/watch?v=L_3xm5NuiqY%26hl%3Den_US%26fs%3D1%26

Bang bang, choo-choo train, let me see you shake that thang. Wm. Steven Humphrey is the editor-in-chief of the Portland Mercury and has held the job since 2000. (So don’t get any funny ideas.)