Over at the always-delightful FilmDrunk, editor Oliver Noble has painstakingly assembled (eh? EH?) a nearly four-minute-long video that contains every bone that’s ever been broken by Steven Seagal. In movies, I mean. I imagine if this video included all of Seagal’s real-life bone-breakings, it would go on for like three hours.
All of its cracking, crunching, screaming, whimpering, and thick-tongued quipping aside, this video made me realize something: The fatter Steven Seagal gets, the more he seems to enjoy hurting people. I guess that makes sense, when you think about it.
Erik: that was an absolutely hilarious write up.Good job!
All the broken bones belong to bad guys, and they had it coming. PS: I know it was just a movie. Actually several, I guess.
I only lasted 48 seconds of watching that. Owwww.
STEVEN SEAGAL JESUS CHRIST IS MY FAVORITE
I AM HIS BROTHER CATHOLICS HE KNOWES WAZ UP MY BROTHER JESUS CHRIST STEVEN SEAGAL AND I MISS HIM EVEN DOW I CANT MEET HIM BECUASE W.E CANT BURN ARE SELF BUT TO PUT IN WORK I AM NEXT CHAMACO THAT WHAT MOM AND DAD CALL BROTHERS IRISH CATHOLICS MUCH LOVE
HA HA HA HA HA MY BRAIN IS LAUGHING
MY GRANDPA GOD THE FATHER AND BROTHER JESUSCHRIST HATE OF WORLD UNSTRAIGHT PEOPLE WE HATE THEM DID YOU READ THE BIBLE WE ARE SMART ALL DOES PEOPLE FOR NOT HAVING RESPECT I WANT TO GET OUT OF BRAIN WE HATE MUCH LOVE JESUSCHRIST IS STEVE SEAGAL ONCE AGAIN SEE YOU.
YOU TOLD YOUR MIJO NOT EVER MESS WITH ME HA
EAITHER WE RIDE OR DIE BROTHER JESUSCHRIST STEVENSEAGAL
U IS LIKE THAT LIKE THAT YEAH IS LIKE THAT IS LIKE THAT.