JEALOUS BOYFRIENDS
Ever notice how your boyfriend squirms anytime you mention that one-night stand you had in college? Or how he makes vomit noises every time you wear one of your ex-boyfriend’s T-shirts? Or when he accuses you of sleeping with the hottie bank teller, or asks a few too many questions about your wild night out on the town with the gals? Men: Why so jealous? Reason: it’s in their nature; just ask Charles Darwin. Here are a few flicks showcasing jealous guys at their worst.
– Mr. Jealousy (1997)–Starring Eric Stoltz and Annabella Sciorra, this is the story of Lester, a guy so crazy jealous of his girlfriend’s past that he joins her old boyfriend’s therapy group. Unable to use his real name, he masquerades as his best friend Vince–and airs Vince’s dirty laundry. Eventually he becomes buddies with the old boyfriend, but is still forced to keep a false identity, which makes him seem like a raving psycho when his girlfriend finally finds out. A subtly funny and ridiculous movie that teaches men to cool it on the jealousy stuff, and women to cool it on the old boyfriend stories.
– Days of Heaven (1978)–Richard Gere and his girlfriend Abby pretend to be brother and sister while looking for work in early 1900s Texas. They land a job with a rich sharecropper who’s dying of a mysterious illness, and much to their delight, also wants to marry Abby. Where does the jealousy come in? Well, the sharecropper doesn’t die, and Richard Gere wants his girl back. Jerk!
– Fear (1996)–Marky Mark wins over a virginal Reese Witherspoon by creepily whispering in her ear and fingering her on a rollercoaster. But when something seems too good to be true, it usually is, and Marky shows his insanity when he snaps the neck of her male buddy and rapes her best friend Mona. Soon enough we’re treated to the requisite bloody climax where Reese and her family are stabbed to death. Ha, ha, just kidding. Surprisingly, they survive. KATIE SHIMER