DISAPPOINTINGLY, the main character in Haywire is not named “Haywire.” Instead, her name is the significantly more boring “Mallory,” which is a goddamn shame, because she’s the exact opposite of boring. Played by MMA fighter Gina Carano—who I did not know existed a month ago but now might be the love of my life—Mallory’s a soldier/spy/assassin who could quadriplegicize James Bond and make Jason Bourne whimper like a tiny little emo baby. Actually, “Mallory” is a totally inappropriate name for Carano’s character; therefore, I will be referring to her only as “Haywire.” It’s more fitting than “Mallory,” and it’s even better than Carano’s name when she was on American Gladiators as “Crush,” which, in a total coincidence, happens to be my middle name. (Fate.)
So in Haywire, Haywire is running around being 100 percent deadly and beautiful when her skeevy employer (Ewan McGregor) assigns her an easy, last-minute job. But of course that job goes straight to shit, and soon enough, Haywire’s running and kicking and shooting her way through a bloody labyrinth of subterfuge.
As he did four months ago with Contagion, director Steven Soderbergh dives full-on into genre: If Contagion was his melodramatic ’70s disaster saga, Haywire is his lean, tough action flick, and he infuses the thing with enough adrenaline to make most other action movies look like wussy little Jason Bournes. With a vibe that recalls the style and confidence of ’60s spy flicks, Haywire moves with a blend of speed, grace, and brutality.
Which is a good way to describe Carano, too—she isn’t going to swipe an Oscar from Meryl Streep anytime soon, but she’s as charismatic, clever, and driven of a heroine as one could want. Haywire is crammed with A-list actors (McGregor, Michael Fassbender, Michael Douglas, Antonio Banderas), but all of ’em fade into the background whenever Carano’s onscreen. That gender dynamic is hardly at the forefront of Haywire, but Soderbergh and screenwriter Lem Dobbs don’t soft-pedal it, either: Carano’s fights are cringe-inducingly tough, and perhaps the wisest words in the film are when one man cautions another: “You shouldn’t think of her as being a woman,” he says. “That would be a mistake.”
So while Haywire is Carano’s film (sigh), it’s Soderbergh’s lean, sharp, stylish direction that marks it as something remarkable: Pulling no punches, narrative or literal, Haywire burns along—whether Carano is kicking a dude through a door, or Soderbergh’s capturing a desperate foot chase in a long, wordless stretch, the whole thing’s a welcome dose of the kinetic excitement that good action movies are made of.
I have known about her far more than a month, you back off Henriksen. Just kidding, we can all admire Gina. Good review, I am going to see Haywire as soon as I can. Btw, I have met her in person a few years ago. Very nice down to earth person.
This movie looks incredibly STUPID! It’s unfortunate that both WW and the Merc. have given this retarded mess such undeservingly high reviews.
“You shouldn’t think of her as being a woman”? Eww. Just… no. Normally I’ll check out what Soderbergh’s up to, but I’m skipping this. These faux-feminist ninja/assassin/spy clichés were worn out 20 years ago.
@ DaDaA
You are saying that the positive reviews of this movie are wrong because the movie “looks” stupid? Even though they have actually seen the movie and you haven’t? So you really don’t have any idea if the praise for the movie is deserved or not, do you? You’re just a presumptuous little shit who seems to hate everything about the publication you can’t stop commenting on.
@3…threatened by it are you?
This last post looks incredibly STUPID! It’s unfortunate that somone who reads both WW and the Merc. still uses the word retarded in this day and age. Also, this movie is getting great reviews across the nation, not just here and you are stupid for basing your entire opinion on 30-second commercial spots. You suck and shut up.
Ok, fyi i use the word ‘retarded’ quite sparsely. But RETARDED is exactly the best way to describe this piece-of-garbage! I should’ve stopped reading the review the moment i came across “MMA”. Infact, that soo many people seem to like this only indicates just how shitty it must actually be.
So, go be a dummy and waste $11-13 of your money. I’ve got better sense than that, though.
I don’t even need to read the review. It may be a retarded action film, but its got Soderbergh and a great cast, and some retarded action films are actually badass and fun to watch. I am an MMA fan and so I’ve been a super Gina Carano fan for years, and its great to see her break out into action films. Why bother seeing lame, CG-stunt double crap from the likes of Milla Jovovich and Kate Beckinsale when you can see the real deal?
Josh, i totally stopped reading at “I am an MMA fan…”. and knew EXACTLY what kind of person you are.
@9…I am also a fan and former fighter…I bet you know EXACTLY what kind of person I am too, right?
No, you don’t.
Nice pretentiousness and prejudice you asshat douche.
I think I know what kind of person you are however, based on your idiotic posts
Every fucking thread, man. Every fucking thread goes like this now.
So hey, The Merc: no one at all would accuse you of “censorship” if you just stopped posting the many idiotic things this person with several accounts keeps posting. In fact, they’d welcome it because it would be one of the few occasions that someone with an online concern decided that the loudest and dumbest don’t also get to do most of the talking.
Puttin’ it out there.
Yeah this is for GaddafiA. I have never submitted a post to the Mercury or any other blog cite in my life until the other day, and it was out of boredom. So it appears the stereotype is true about internet tough guys who need to hide behind their keyboard to speak their minds. The showstopper is right– you are a pretentious prejudiced douche. What, do you think all MMA fans drink 4Loco and Monster Energy, wear lame Tapout shirts, live in Gresham and are violent assholes? I am a liberal, progressive, well read person with B.A.’s in Asian History and Social Justice from a liberal arts college. I support Environment Oregon and Amnesty International. I love cats and a good graphic novel. Do you still know EXACTLY what kind of person I am?
“What, do you think all MMA fans drink 4Loco and Monster Energy, wear lame Tapout shirts, live in Gresham and are violent assholes?”
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No not at all, sir. Some of you cretins live in Beaverton, too.
@josh..thank you. More eloquently put than my post, and I would suggest that most of the “stereotypical ” behavior you describe can be chalked up to being young, male and confused (but that could describe a lot of subsets). I have a History degree and currently help train a young man who is a UFC competitor, and his goal (in terms of education) is to be a history teacher. An admirable goal. Thank you for your support of Amnesty International. I too support it along with other organizations ( I am happy to say I have been able to help three kids through Children International.)