Thursday, April 4
8:00 OXY HYPE!–Movie
(1996) Travel back to the thrilling days of flannel and superfluous ski caps with this documentary about the Seattle grunge scene.
10:00 NBC E.R.
Dr. Greene’s brain tumor makes him lose muscle coordination (which probably isn’t as funny as it sounds).
Friday, April 5
8:00 CBS AFP: AMERICAN FIGHTER PILOT
On the first day of Top Gun flight school, the recruits have an underpants modeling competition.
8:00 MTV THE OSBOURNES
Two back-to-back episodes in which Ozzy prepares for his tour and battles with non-Satanic neighbors.
Saturday, April 6
9:00 ABC ROMY AND MICHELE’S HIGH SCHOOL REUNION–Movie
(1997) Mira Sorvino and Lisa Kudrow as two dingbat losers with a surefire plan to get revenge on their high school.
9:00 AMC COUNT YORGA, VAMPIRE–Movie
(1970) Yorga gets his blood-suckin’ groove on in this hippie-filled retelling of Dracula.
Sunday, April 7
8:00 A&E SHACKLETON–Movie
(2002) Limey Kenneth Branagh as the famous explorer who goes to Antarctica and gets caught ass-deep in ice!
9:00 ABC ALIAS
Sydney is on a secret mission and runs into an old ex-boyfriend (who accuses her of stealing all of his Duran Duran records).
Monday, April 8
9:00 ABC THE BACHELOR
A new game show in which sixteen women humiliate themselves to impress one single meathead.
Tuesday, April 9
9:00 COM THE SWEET SPOT
Bill Murray and his family compete against each other and exchange smacktalk in an annual golf tournament.
10:00 FX THE SHIELD
Vic responds to the news of his child being autistic by beating the shit out of an Armenian drug gang.
Wednesday, April 10
9:30 WB FELICITY
When school gets tough, Felicity decides to do what the rest of us have been doing for years–CHEAT.